#maybe some day in the far future i’ll do these in a different color way
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mildmayfoxe · 9 months ago
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ok bad pic but here’s what i got done. got about ~14 “acceptable” vines plus words out of ~23 prints so better than half but not by much 😪 did some 8x10s too but didn’t look too close at those. i had TWO vines on this fancy confetti washi & those both came out ok thank god. did some plain with just text & then since i had the red out & wanted to print something that actually looked nice remembered i had this cute cute heart stamp i wanted to experiment with printing like a block (cause like why not) that i took from work & printed up a batch of those. i’m gonna carve something to put in the middle of them but not sure yet. so i printed about one million prints today but really mixed bag on success rate
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oswlld · 6 months ago
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oswlld's monthly wrap up: april
note: i am trying something a bit different this year, so bear with me as i figure out how i want to format this. i wanted to spend more time sharing what i consume, beyond what i rb, and put my thoughts in one place. these posts are okay to rb
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This Is How You Lose the Time War, Amal El-Mohtar & Max Gladstone [started 04/04, finished 04/09] *drags my hands down my face until the end of time* I want to meet you in every place I ever loved. I want to meet you in every place I ever loved. I want to meet you in every place I ever loved. I want to meet you in every place I ever loved. I want to meet you in every place I ever loved. I WANT TO MEET YOU!!!! IN EVERY PLACE I EVER LOVED!!!!!!!!!!!!! 4.75⭐️ in storygraph. — Hamnet, Maggie O’Farrell [started 04/12, in prog] I am about 100 pages in and still not sure if I want to keep going or DNF it. idk what isn’t sticking because the writing is beautiful and the pacing is great. And I do care about the characters, I really do. I love the way the author borrows from future grief, it’s what I am enjoying most about this read so far. Maybe I’ll give it 50 more pages and see if it finally sticks.
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23.5 Degrees, GMMTV [started: 03/08, ongoing] As mentioned, I am caught up on eps 3-8. I’ll likely not be able to watch it live in may but I will be keeping up with the series til the end. It’s so lighthearted and charming! Not sure how they managed this, but I am constantly surprised by the character group dynamics. It’s def due to the great chemistry everyone has with literally everyone. I need NEED to discuss the score of this show because it’s IMMACULATE. The celestial themes, from the props all the way down to the music, is so rich. I’m so excited to see how this story unravels. — Devil’s Plan [started: 04/23, ongoing] This is a bestie pick, a show my best friend chose to have us watch on our facetime calls. We are 1.5 eps in and it’s a grower. The first game is hella complex and we’re slowly picking up on what’s happening. The people on this show are incredibly intelligent, so I feel like I have to work extra hard to keep up. It does feel rewarding, I’m hooked.
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Oppenheimer, Peacock [watched on 04/05] I am a self-proclaimed Nolan girlie, I’ll admit it. I do enjoy his work and the many ways he translates time into film. When I wrote this, it had been a few days since I watched it and I still think abt the little moments that blew me away. Moments like the accentuated dust particles, how the coloring of the movie can be an unreliable narrator, and the utilization of a crowded hall stomping their feet to create tension. The last eight minutes still haunts me. I find more value in the technical side of film, but I will give credit when credit is due: every award Cillian Murphy got this season was so well earned. He carried all three hours of that film with such powerful quietude. And lastly, my heart now belongs to Jennifer Lame. Upon seeing her accept the award for Best Film Editing for Oppenheimer, I have come to learn that she also edited Tenet. HER MIND!!! She has such a bright future ahead of her, to be up there with the minds of Thelma Schoonmaker and Anne V Coates. — Yellow Door: ’90s Lo-Fi Film Club [watched on 04/14] This film needs to be studied in film school. It’s incredibly meta in some ways, having renown directors be the subjects, talking about their passion for film. The production being so stylized and the editing feels very reminiscent of Our Beloved Summer, with the way the found footage and the aspect ratios are intertwined with current day quality shots. This film will hit everyone right in the millennial. A true surprise for me is discovering that Bong Joon Ho and I are more alike that I had originally thought. The way he speaks in casual conversation and his story of setting strict rules for their film collection had me hollering because SAME. The most jessi thing he recounted was how all the VHS tapes were labelled. Yellow Door is somehow the opposite of the "doesn’t take itself too seriously" mentality; it’s actually so great that they made the film like that. By fully immersing us with gorgeous cinematography, cheeky editing sequences, and lush music to tug at your heartstrings, it bewitches you into loving film as much as they did. And still do.
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Cowboy Carter, Beyoncé [relisten] I’ve given this several good cycles to confirm my first impressions: it’s def one of her most cohesive albums to date and still stands as a spectacular album. This passion project of hers takes such great care and attention to the voices she amplifies. I can feel the hunger, the innate need for her to make this album. If you haven’t heard how this album came to be, I insist you take the time to educate yourselves. It makes the listening experience so much more empowering. Good for her… GOOD. FOR. HER!! Current favs: Ameriican Requiem, 16 Carriages, Bodyguard, Jolene, Spaghettii, Ya Ya, Desert Eagle, II Hands II Heaven, and Sweet/Honey/Buckin’. — Older, Lizzy McAlpine [first time listening] Coming off the heels of my Five Seconds Flat hyperfixation last year, I haphazardly went into Older hoping its a natural progression in production value. I was shocked that it turned out to be a completely different sound. I soon learned that she actually didn’t really like how Five Seconds Flat was produced because it didn’t feel true to her as an artist. Tbh I was feeling a little lost after the first listen but after digesting this new info, I went back into it and appreciated it a lot more. In fact, the third listen was when I realized that it gave off the same energy as Laufey. I’m excited to listen to it again soon. — Stick Season: Forever, Noah Kahan [first time listening] Having stumbled on all the collabs on Alexa earlier this year, Forever was the only new song for me from his latest release. I’m OBSESSED with this song!!!! The way his voice carries the entire weight of every hurt inside me and just takes it away. Something healed in me. I play it in the car every time I leave the house. I cry in the car every time I leave the house. — The Tortured Poets Department, Taylor Swift [first time listening, standard vinyl ed.] I am going to get this out of the way and say that this album is great. Just great. I understand more than ever why she felt the need to make this album. Having only listened to the standard version a couple times and the anthology twice through, I sit here in this kind of… discomfort. And I’m kind of okay with that feeling. But… it pains me that I can’t share this album with some people in my life and it’s largely due to how she depicts her struggles with people with mental illness/addiction. It’s one, if not the biggest, strike I have against this album and by extension, her. Songs cycling in my head: Down Bad, So Long London, Guilty as Sin?, Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me?, loml, imgonnagetyouback, Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus, How Did It End?, I Look in People’s Windows, The Prophecy, Peter, and The Manuscript.
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EXPO Chicago [attended 04/13] Yes, I am doxxing myself a bit if you didn’t already know. During college, I used to attend EXPO yearly and occasionally went back long after I finished school. I haven’t attended in a long time, so I made it my goal to attend this year. And I had a blast! My mother tagged along and she’s not one to attend shows like this or art museums in general. It was a beautiful day trip to the city and it was nice to have her company. She mostly trailed behind and took pics of me as I floated around the exhibition hall. I have 50+ artists I tracked on my phone to actively research in my spare time. I sat in on one of the panel talks (ON COLOR), discussing color theory in today’s bipoc landscape. I took so much away from that conversation, it was very charged. I'm kinda obsessed with Alteronce Gumby, I need to do an artist deepdive on his work. — Coachella [watched from 04/12 to 04/14] I work for a big tech company and one of the biggest events to be on standby for is Coachella. I had to be on call for Friday and was backup support for Sunday lineups. Thus, Saturday was the only day I could sit back and relax while watching. My first time lineups included: Hatsune Miku, Peso Pluma, Late Night Drive Home, Jon Batiste, Ateez, le Sserafim, Purple Disco Machine, Bleachers, No Doubt, 88rising Futures, and Latin Mafia. Of all of the performances, I want to take a full deep dive into Ateez and Peso Pluma’s discography in the near future.
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liliana-meadowpink · 1 year ago
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Stinkbugs and Silk: a short palia fic!
It had been a long day. Lillie unlatched the gate to the mountain’s housing area and wandered through the trees to her campsite. She was greeted by Kenyatta as she stood up from the coffee table she had been sitting on.
“Oh, good, you’re finally home.”
“Yes, sorry to keep you waiting.” Lillie responded, walking to her stove and pouring two mugs of tea.
“Did you talk with Jel about my dress yet?” Kenyatta sat down on the coffee table again, accepting the tea. “You better have.”
(More fic under the cut!)
Lillie hesitated. “Yes, but…” How should she explain it? It was so uncomfortable having to go between her friends in this manner. She got the feeling this used to happen a lot with her human friends and it didn’t end well.
“But what?” Kenyatta prompted, setting the empty mug aside. “I don’t like how this is sounding.”
“Look, is there ANYTHING I can do to convince you to wear the dress? Anything at all? Jel worked hard on it and I don’t know if we even have time to make something different.”
“Not a thing. I’ll buy something off the rack.”
“Ken-ya-tta!” Lillie gasped, putting emphasis on each syllable for comedy. “You wouldn’t! You can’t anyway since your fashion tastes aren’t mass produced!”
“I MIGHT consider it… if you can guess what I want you to do.” Kenyatta smirked.
Lillie sighed. “You just said there’s nothing, so I’m gonna talk with your mom about the dress, and…”
“As if she would even listen?”
“Good point. Still, something has to be done. Sure, Jel caved into the pressure of other people’s expectations, but he still got your colors right and it’s supposedly comfortable to wear. Can you at least not be insulted by his efforts? Please?”
“Why are you defending Jel so much?” Kenyatta studied’s Lillie’s face as it shifted hues from its regular soft beige appearance to a color between that of the a scintillating centipede and a briar daisy.
“I… well, I, um… I… Don’t… exactly know.”
“Right. Well, look. Mom’s got a meeting with my aunt, the duchess, coming up. Go hide a stink bug in her desk.”
“Then you’ll wear Jel’s dress?”
“MAYBE.”
“Good. Thank you. I can definitely put a stink bug in there.”
“Great.”
“Are you already leaving?” Lillie followed Kenyatta through the trees, rummaging through her bag.
“Yeah.”
“Okay, well… At least take this antler? I have no idea what to even do with these things.”
“Thanks. See you later.”
“Yes, we will!” Lillie closed the gate and looked down at Aqua and Luna. “That went better than expected.”
The two palcats squeaked in agreement and scampered back to the house.
0~☆*:.。.~☆~.。.:*☆~ *:.。.~☆~.。.:*☆~0~☆*:.。.~☆~.。.:*☆~
“So… I, uh, I did it.”
“Now we just have to sit and wait.” Kenyatta smiled, watching the awkward way Lillie pretended she wasn’t rocking back and forth on her heels.
“Happy to help.”
“I'm glad. You know if this works out, I can think of some other tasks I might want to give you in the future.” She blinked when Lillie stopped fidgeting. “Usually Nai'o does this kind of stuff for me, but lately he's been busy with his family or whatever.”
“Oh, yeah, the fair’s coming up. They’re preparing for EVERYTHING. The jam, the animals, the music…”
“Are you going to help them out?”
“Not sure. I don’t wanna travel very far without my cats.” Lillie said, picking up Aqua and burying her face in his fur.
“Couldn’t you ask someone to take care of them for you?”
“Not really. It’s fine, though. I know one palcat is a handful, let alone four.” She put Aqua down and he rubbed his face against Kenyatta’s boots. “Gosh, I don’t even want to imagine the destruction they’d cause if they stayed with Jel for example! All the pretty fabric, ruined either by claw marks or endless piles of fur.”
“What about the cook?”
“Reth? Oh, he’d be good at it, but they would probably mess with the soup. Besides… Everyone else is too busy.”
Kenyatta thought for a moment. “How about the fishing galdur, uh… Einar, right?”
“What about him?”
“You seem pretty close. Always going to his cave. At midnight.”
“Whoa, whoa, hey. You spy on me?”
“Of course!” Kenyatta smirked.
“Well I don’t ALWAYS go to the cave. Usually I just catch him on the way there and we really only say a few phrases in passing. It’s small talk and nothing more.”
“You’re defensive again.”
“And you’ve been reading too many books.”
Lillie and Kenyatta stared at each other with increasing levels of frown before they both cracked up laughing.
“Okay, tell me honestly! Do you really think that Einar would be interested in ME?!” Lillie gasped. “He’s a three thousand year old galdur with TWO onenesses, and I’m a human who’s vaguely in my late twenties. I have nothing to do all day but run around helping people.”
“Do you like fishing?”
“Yes.”
“Then yeah, I think he would like you.”
“What, romantically?”
“You’re asking about this just to get me off the topic of you potentially having a crush on Jel.”
Lillie’s face went bright pink once more. “What? No way. He’s so obsessed with the night. I need sunshine to survive.”
“You’d make a great pair. Night and light.”
“We would be a very sleepy pair.”
“Good thing you’re learning how to make comfortable beds. If you keep going at it, you might be able to make a bed that’s good enough for…” Kenyatta trailed off when she realized how uncomfortable Lillie looked.
“I think we’re done with this conversation for now. See you later?”
“Yeah. Bye.” Kenyatta waved briefly as Lillie zoomed away.
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nepxnth3 · 2 years ago
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Yours Truly.
Part 1 / ?
Wally x G!N reader
You recently moved to a different neighborhood it was beautiful and had bright colors.
You were going outside to check your mailbox, you lived not too far from someone named “Wally darling.” “Oh!..good morning, neighbor.” he gave you a soft smile, it was early of the day. “Good morning, Wally!” You brightly smiled back. “Neighbor, Do you need any help with your belongings moving in?” he asked sweetly, soft tone to his voice, he slightly tilts his head. He seemed friendly yet … has a strange sense of aura to him, it’s almost like there’s something about him you’re not sure of. Maybe you’re just paranoid. “I’d actually like that” You spoke softly, still tired but you still managed to smile at him softly. “Right this way then!” he chirps as he’d take one of your luggage. “I must be say neighbor , it is so nice to have you here!” he grinned. “You’ll fit in here perfectly! If you need anything just let me know, I can help out anytime!” he said excitedly and such a reassuring way. It sounded so genuine. “Well, Hello wally it’s so amazing to meet you, you’re my next door neighbor if I’m correct?” You asked him raising a brow.
“That is correct!” he smiles nodding his head. “and if you ever need anything, I’m right nearby so please, do not feel like you can’t ask because I’m always here to help” he would smile sweetly, it felt so odd to you. “Can i show you where I live?” He asks. “Mhm.” You nod your head. He show you to where he lives, it was near some of the shops of the town, and it looked cozy from the outside, it was so colorful yet so warm. You look a bit in the town and saw people you were going to ask Wally about them. You walk back to your home. “That’s good to know! I’m baking later it would be a great time to get to know each other better!” You clasped your hands together. He seem kind of shocked you said it but his pupil got bigger and he smiled a bit wider, he turned slightly pink shade of pink, he looked so happy and excited you offered that. “Ah! I’d love to talk with you neighbor! That’d be nice to get to know you!” he smiles brightly tilting his head a bit. “Perhaps if you ever need help with a recipe I could help with that too!” he chuckles. “When we’re walking to your home who were the people there in the neighborhood” you asked him. “Those are my neighbors, you could talk to them later if you like!” He says. “I’ll talk to them later, at the moment I want to finish moving.” You picked up a box.
“Do you want to continue helping me or are you going to stand there?” You tease him slightly. “Ah, My bad. Of course neighbor.” He opens the door for you before picking up some boxes. “So neighbor, what’s your name?” He questions. “Oh dear! How rude of me. My name is y/n l/n, Thank you for asking” you apologized. “It’s fine. A beautiful name like yours fits you!” He chuckles.
Most of the day it was wally helping you unpack and helping you with your stuff. You started making plans for today or what you could do for the week.
1. Sort out of the boxes
2. Meet the neighbors
3. Bake with Wally
As the week go by you could add more stuff. Wally brought in the final box. “Thank you so much Wally!” You chirp. “I hope we can talk later so we can become better friend” you clasped your hands. “It’s been a pleasure talking to you, Neighbor. I believe we shall be friends in the future, I can always use one more!" he softly smiles, his eyeslids lowered. “Neighbor, If you ever need me, please do not hesitate to come and get me, I will most likely be at home drawing / painting or taking a walk around the neighborhood or doing chores of course!" he says brightly. "But yes! I do hope we can become close friends, even best friends. I’d truly enjoy that." He says fixing the “Rose Madder” scarf with a bow knot he had around his neck. You looked up at the sky and realize it was getting dark, you had spent the whole day talking to Wally while he helped you out with moving your stuff. “Well, it’s quite late isn’t it? I’ll see you tomorrow, Wally!” You said cheerfully. “Oh yes, it is getting quite late. Good night neighbor I shall see you more.” He says in a soft voice as he tilts his head and his lowers his eyelids.
You enter your house, covered in boxes. “I’ll just unpack tomorrow.” You thought to yourself. You go to where you wanted your room to be. There was a naked mattress on the floor. You were too tired to put the blankets nor pillows. You get on in and put your hands under your head. The whole night you kept flipping back and forth, not able to get comfortable. It was as if someone was watching you. “Eh.. I’m just paranoid probably” you shrugged. “Damn this damn mattress is so uncomfortable with out blankets.” You thought to yourself.
Well tomorrow was going to be a different day.
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otomehoneyybearr · 1 month ago
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Act 12
Episode 21: The What-If Future and The Certain Now: Sakyo
Working w/ Maybelle Lace, jujumin-translates, Fea
Note: As you read, you will see that some sentences highlighted in a different color, this is what they indicate.
Pink: Flashback
Blue: Characters are acting
𑁍𑁍𑁍𑁍𑁍𑁍𑁍𑁍𑁍
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Sakyo: (...I suppose this is the last time I'll see this signboard.)
Sakyo: ...
Sakyo: (I've made up my mind. Whether I’m resented or hated, I’ll bear it all.)
Paper Fortune: "We will surely meet again someday. 3 points luck. Small blessing."
Sakyo: Hmph..
Sakyo: (This stuff is really not that reliable.)
Manager: Kyaaaa! Stop itttttt!
Sakyo: Do it, Sakoda. Just go for the signboard.
Sakoda: Aye aye, sir!
Sakyo: (Yukio... Even so, I...)
Manager: Gyaaaah!
Sakyo: (At this theater, again...)
Izumi: "Aren't you going in?"
Sakyo: ...!
Sakoda: ...Boss?
Sakyo: …!
Sakoda: Are you okay? Do you have a cold? Or maybe you have something more serious...?! W-What would I do if you die Boss…?!...!
Sakyo: Shut up. Don’t be so dramatic. It's not that I'm sick.
Sakoda: If so, that's fine...
Sakyo: Let's cut it short for today.
Sakyo: I've got a place to stop by, so just drop me off here. You go head back to the office with the car.
Sakoda: Got it.
Sakyo: ...It's a wreck.
Sakyo: (But, at least the sign survived.)
Sakyo: (If she had arrived at the Mankai Theater even a little later that day...)
Sakyo: (Or if she had come on a completely different day altogether...)
Sakyo: (I could have destroyed this theater's signboard, filled with the precious feelings of so many people, with my own hands.)
Sakyo: (Even now, it's horrifying to imagine.)
Sakyo: (At the time, I thought it was the best course of action. That there was no other way to make this theater spark back to life...)
Sakyo: (But, she showed me a future that far exceeded my expectations.)
Sakyo: (As long as there was someone who always openly talked about their passion for theater, the future I feared would never come.)
Sakyo: (When she first took over as general director, she was inexperienced and unreliable, but as the performances went on, she grew quickly.
Sakyo: (Before I knew it, she had become a great general director.)
Sakyo: You're becoming more and more like Yukio..
Sakyo: (The way you become a bit forceful in order to create the best play, and the sparkle in your eyes when you talk about the stage, are very similar to each other.)
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Izumi: Sakyo, you've been familiar with this theater for longer than you'd care to admit.
Izumi: And I'm willing to wager you cared deeply for it. Or should I say, care
Sakyo: ...
Izumi: There was an anonymous survey form from a Spring Troupe show that was loaded with feedback. That was you, wasn't it?
Sakyo: ...
Izumi: Would you come to the audition? Please
Izumi: You're a dependable presence in the training hall. I'm incredibly glad to have you.
Izumi: But I'll be honest—sometimes you really frustrate me, too.
Sakyo: What do you mean
Izumi: You don't place yourself on equal footing with the rest of the group. And it's not just because you're older.
Izumi: You don't ever try to vie or compete like Banri and Juza do
Izumi: If anything, you're always the first to step back and let everyone else take the reins.
Sakyo: I mean...
Izumi: Maybe it can be chalked up to seniority, but I don't think that's all it is. You're shying away from the idea of changing yourself.
Sakyo: What do you mean, shying away?
Izumi: What you said about having no business being on stage? That, right there. A part of you won't accept the fact that you might have a future acting in plays.
Izumi: But you know what? You're going to keep being in them. You have to. And you're going to be expected to do better than ever on that stage.
Izumi: The only way for you to get there is for you to step up even more than anyone else. Get the screw-ups out of your system. Stop playing it safe and play it for real.
Izumi: You'll never grow if you don't get experience. Let go of your past and look towards the future.
Izumi: You're not the guy who gave up on theater anymore.
Sakyo: ...
Sakyo: (It's already too late, there's nothing I can do about it. I made excuses for myself and pretended not to notice my true feelings.)
Sakyo: (It was that person's forcefulness, of all things, that grabbed my face and forced me to look forward.)
Sakyo: (I never thought that I’dd be immaturely competing with young people at my age.)
Sakyo: (I got caught up in the vigor of the Autumn Troupe and have been giving my all every day with no room to spare.
Sakyo: (...Just how much will she mess up my life?)
Sakyo: ...
Sakyo: We will surely meet again someday, huh...
Sakyo: (...I can't believe it really came true. I guess you shouldn’t underestimate the connections between people.)
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Sakyo: I'm back.
Azami: Hey.
Azami: Here, this is from Sakuya.
Sakyo: A postcard?
Sakyo: (Come to think of it, he said he wanted to go on a journey to trace his roots.)
Sakyo: ...
Sakuya: "I feel like I'll be able to grasp something very important on this trip."
Sakuya: "When I think about my roots, what comes to mind is that day, which was the biggest turning point in my life."
Sakuya: "The other day, we talked about when we started the new Mankai Company."
Sakuya: "I'm glad that Sakyo lent money to Mankai Company."
Sakuya: "And I'm glad that Director and Sakyo were the ones who watched my first performance that day!"
Sakyo: ...Those ain't the kinda words you should say to a yakuza.
Sakyo: (...Sounds like you're in for a good trip.)
Ichiro: Furuichi, the Boss would like to see you.
Sakyo: I'll be right there
Sakyo: Excuse me.
Boss: ... Sakyo, I'm almost done with that thing you asked me to do.
Sakyo: Really?
Boss: Well, they're a shady bunch, doing all sorts of underhanded stuff. Information is also coming in from everywhere.
Sakyo: (...As expected of the old man.)
Azami: What are y'all talking about?
Sakyo: There's no way the yakuza can just stay silent and let them get away with all this.
Sakyo: This is the signal for a counterattack.
Boss: We should show them some gratitude in return.
𑁍𑁍𑁍𑁍𑁍𑁍𑁍𑁍𑁍
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drawloverlala · 2 years ago
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May Status Update
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It’s May! well basically like an hour into it lol 😆, anyways I wanted to write an entry about stuff and the progress on my current commission batch! 
Commission batch work in progress:
🌸 Commissions without background: 11 in total
1 still not started
3 still on sketch phase
1 is on base colors
5 are finished! 
🌸 Commissions with background: 4 in total
still not started: 2
sketch in progress: 3
from last time I got 2 commissions more, that before I was waiting on which listing they were supposed to belong to, it was basically 1 and 1 from each one! 
and yeah, I’m hoping to keep making progress on these this new month! and I’m looking forward to try some other stuff as well!
some more ramblings under the line here
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I recently finished some notebooks I was working on since the beginning of this year, and I’m hoping to be able to sell them on Facebook maybe? I don’t intend to make too much with them since, they’re still far from very professional looking notebooks 😅, but I’m also wanting to invest on more supplies, and I’m taking notes as well to keep learning how to make these better!
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I certainly learned a lot during the process of making these XD, I made a lot of mistakes as well lol 
Also, here you can see the 2 designs I did, I did another one but the printer ran out of ink and I couldn’t use it lol, (another thing I gotta invest in the future is inks or maybe a new printer lol) and you can see here my Cinch machine! 
honestly I’m super tired, I finished these today and I had to store all materials and such again... and ugh... I seriously NEED a shelf to put all these machines and supplies, every time I’m going to use them I gotta take them all out of boxes and they are all under more boxes...gotta put them on boxes again and put everything again in order next to my bed..it also doesn’t look all too nice in there, so I’m going to start seriously looking for shelves next month 😆 
Other thing I wanted to ramble about, I recently got into Inkblot!  it’s a new art site, it has like around 1 year I think?, it’s still in development but so far it’s been pretty alright, Here’s my site so far:
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I’ve been wanting to use it to put all my commission art, I’ve finally catch up to last year’s work, so I can start posting this year work! I also want to put my other works here, kinda using it as a general gallery like the one I had with Deviant art.
There’s still so much I haven’t put here, but slowly filling with art! still doesn’t feel as my old DA’s gallery and sometimes the site loads pretty slowly, but I want to give it a chance since it’s still pretty new, I look forward to see how it evolves. the community part at least seems pretty chill so far! 
also has this very cool feature, where you can make comparisons!! it has a sort of thing that you move it and you can see the difference between both pictures. 
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I’ll definitely still be using Tumblr for art gallery as well, I already have posted a lot of art here anyways lol, I’ve managed to organize a lot of my art with the tags as well, although I think I’ll also be separating commission art without background and with backgrounds, that way they are all not too mixed up! 
Oh also, I’ve learned about Neocities! recently people were talking about it on Twitter, and seems like a cool option for a personalized website! although may first have to learn more about html coding 😆
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Neocities is an open source site, you can own a site here and customize it however you want, but you gotta do it from scratch! it’s honestly pretty cool, I think customization of Tumblr themes is pretty close to this,
but even so, if you check the sites from here just for fun, THEY ARE FANTASTIC! it’s like taking a look at internet in 2008, the customization value is so cool!
I personally find very fun the customization options like this, I may want to give this a try some day 😄
Well I think that’s all, this ramble became a bit too long lol but well, thanks if you read this far! 
Hope you have a great first week of May! 
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mad-raptorzzz · 6 months ago
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making more WOF AUs of things I like
this time it’s the Red Queen and Lunar Chronicles books
First up Red Queen. Some dragons have red blood. But animus dragons have silver blood. If an animus has an egg with a non animus, they get a non animus dragonet. This has resulted in silver blooded dragons considering themselves elite and only breeding other silver blooded dragons. Species has nothing to do with it, all that matters is the blood. In this AU, no dragons can breathe fire or ice breath, and RainWings don’t have any of their abilities either. In fact, even fire wielding dragons can’t make their own fire. They have to carry striker stones with them on their wrists and tails to start a spark. Stronger animus mating pairs means stronger dragonets. But maybe these silver blooded animus dragons have been covering something up, maybe red blooded dragons can wield animus magic too. Some even more powerful than theirs…
Mare Barrow: Sky/Night/Mud/Leaf. Her NightWing traits are most dominant. Red blooded. Can wield lightning, which is purple in color.
Shade Barrow: Sky/Night/Mud/Leaf. SkyWing traits most dominant. Can teleport short distances. Very speedy.
Maven Calore: Sky/Ice. He’s a good mix, but his IceWing traits are quite noticeable when compared to his brother. Very Pale. Fire wielder, his fire is blue.
Tiberias Calore VII: Sky/Sand. But you’d honestly never tell, he looks nearly 100% SkyWing. Fire wielded with red fire. Definitely dad’s favorite due to his SkyWing predominance.
Evangeline Samos: Hive/Rain. She’s a good mix, perfectly balanced. Metal wielder. Tbh one of my favorite characters I love her sass.
I’ll come up with more when I start my re-read after finishing Iron Flame (almost done).
Now the Lunar Chronicles: A long time ago, ancient dragons developed a way for travel in space with great flying machines. This allowed a subset of the population to colonize the moon. This was before the dragon species had fully settled into modern day. The dragons who left for the moon became what are now called NightWings. The radiation of the moon, which was unknown to the dragons until many years of living there, granted them with special powers to manipulate others impressions of them. Some can read minds and catch glimpses of the future. Powerful dragons can even control or manipulate others. Dragons living back on the home planet have become very wary of these so called NightWings or Lunar Dragons. They hardly ever come down from their moon, but when they do it always causes trouble. All the dragons in this AU retain their abilities. But all NightWings essentially have some form of power/animus magic. HiveWings simply evolved on their own without any NightWing genes. (I’m not set on them actually living on the moon yet, I may just have them live on another continent far away that is very exposed to the moon/moons and/or was made by a large chunk of old moon falling? Either way they get super moon exposure and are pretty isolated)
Linh Cinder: She’s a pure NightWing, however (and this is to better fit the AU and not have dragons immediately know she’s a NightWing) she’s leucistic. So she has very pale scales to begin with, moon blessed as her mother called her. She was also horribly burned as a hatchling, resulting in her being a cyborg dragon and nearly unrecognizable as a NightWing. She has an inhibitor chip blocking her abilities. Most dragons assume she is a mutt of many different tribes from the home planet, definitely some Ice and Sand and Rain and maybe Hive? She’s the long lost Princess if the NightWings, Selene. Scarlet Benoit-Kesley: Sky/Sand/Rain. And just a sprinkle of Night, which is unknown to her. She doesn’t have any ability of the NightWings. she’s a very skilled fighter, non-poisonous barbed tail and no venom or color change, but that doesn’t stop her from being deadly.
Crescent Moon Darnel: Night/Hive. She is a ‘shell’ or a NightWing without abilities. (Technically she’s a full blooded lunar in the books, but her mom is mysterious and unnamed. It was always my headcannon that her mom was either from earth or had some earthness to her, and I think she’d be a cute little Night/Hive hybrid) Wicked smart, a hacker. Pretty shy. But very loyal. Used to work for the Queen, but not anymore!
Winter Blackburn-Hayle: pure NightWing. Considered very beautiful by NightWing standards. Aka dark scales. She was forced to mutilate her own face by her step mother the Queen when she was a dragonet, resulting in three scars on the right side of her face. Does not ever use her NightWing powers Wolf: Night/Mud. From one of the packs of dragons the NightWings bred specifically for protection. They wanted the strength of MudWings with the loyalty to the NightWing throne. No special abilities, but very very strong.
Queen Levena Blackburn: Pure NightWing. Also very very very powerful in terms of NightWing gifts. Can control hundreds of dragons at a time. Uses her power to shield her true appearance due to flame burns on the majority of her left side. She’s very vain. And very evil. Cinder’s Aunt and Winter’s stepmother.
Wahoooooo. Who knows what obsession will be WOFed next. Stay tuned.
I think I’ll someday sketch all these things out.
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hide-in-imagination · 2 years ago
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"Roads That Cross... With Memories"
You can read the previous chapters here: (1),(2), (3), (4), (5), (6), (7), (8), (9), (10), (11), (12), (13), (14), (15), (16), (17), (18), (19), (20), (21), (22), (23), (24), (25), (26)
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Happy early Christmas, everybody! ♡
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In the blink of an eye, three whole days had passed since the return of Juliana. The Roller was lively, the music and the colors seeming more vibrant now that everything was back to how it used to be. Well, not everything, but as Nina’s fingers flew around the keyboard, the familiar sound of typing joining the cheery voices of her friends, she contemplated that things were always changing, nothing ever stayed the same forever, and that was okay because it allowed growth. 
Luna wasn’t the same now that she knew who she truly was, but she’d gained more family and the ability to finally let go of the wondering and the empty space. Nico was no longer there, but he’d left for New York chasing his dreams. Nina herself would soon be graduating high school and doing God knows what. Something related to writing, for sure. She had some ideas, but it was still hard to imagine that by this time next year she’d be at university. Her life, and everyone’s lives, were going to change so much, and in ways only the future could tell.  
All of this she wrote on her laptop— Her musings about time and how fast it went by. Permanence. Change. Future. Her mind was full of these things because time, slowly and tortuously, had snuck up on her.
Gastón would be flying back to England tomorrow. 
Nina’s fingers stumbled and stopped their typing. Procrastinating writing philosophical thoughts was probably not a good idea. It helped her think though, and think she had, all these days, exhaustively. She didn’t think she’d thought this much about Gastón since when she was first crushing on him years ago. 
She also thought a lot about herself. About what she wanted. 
She thought of Eric too. 
She even thought of Xavi, sweet Xavi, and of a hundred hypothetical guys she could maybe meet in the future. 
Future. Past. Possibilities. Fears. Wishes. 
In the end, even if she rationalized everything and tried to find the right answer like in the question of a test, what really mattered were her feelings. 
There was no ‘right’ answer because no one knew what would happen— She could only decide on what she wanted. 
And she did.
Taking a deep breath, Nina grabbed her phone to follow through on what she had set out to do this morning. She tapped her screen, going through different chats until she found his contact. 
N: Can we talk this afternoon?
N: I have my answer.
*************************
Keen eyes looked through documents; checking, evaluating. 
“Okay, as far as I see it, everything’s in order.” Ana smiled. “This event is going to be great.” 
Ámbar placed a hand on her chest and sighed in relief. “Thank you so much, Ana.” She received the papers from her and tucked them in the folder. “I want this to be the best Roller Jam ever. You’re invited, by the way.” 
Ana laughed lightly. “Thank you, I’d love to come.” She put her phone and pen back into her purse and began to stand. “I’ll get going now, I have a hearing in a couple of hours.” 
“Yeah— Oh! Ana! Before I forget.” Ana stopped to hear her. “Could you contact that accountant friend you told me about and see if they can come here one of these days?” Ámbar asked. “Because with the Open Music I could somehow manage, but this event is bigger and there’ll be a lot more things to consider, I could really use their help.” 
“Of course,” Ana said with a smile. “I’ll call her later and ask her, but I don’t think she’ll have any problem.” 
“Awesome. Thank you so much, Ana,” Ámbar said for maybe the fifth time that day, but she was truly a godsend. “I really don’t know what I’d do without you.” 
“You’re completely welcomed.” Ana waved as she walked away. “See you later, Ámbar.” 
“See you!” 
Ámbar grabbed her notepad and scratched ‘Check the documents with Ana’ out of her To-do list. The preparations for the Roller Jam had been going smoothly thus far. She had shown Simón some reference pics she’d found on the internet of Día de los Muertos decorations and he’d helped her pick what would work best for the event. The budget was approved by Vidia and she had almost all planned out. To be honest, she thought she could have this done in a matter of days if it were only the Roller Jam she had to worry about, like back when she did the Flash Open, but now she had her everyday manager responsibilities on top of it, which left her very little time to work on the event. 
She’d thought of just doing it in her free time, but Simón quickly advised her against it. ‘If they’re not paying you for pulling extra hours, don’t do them; it’s not worth it. I learned that years ago.’ Sometimes she forgot that he had so much work experience. She felt sorry for him for having felt the need to start working so young, but she also admired him a lot for it. He knew so many things that she didn’t, like something as crucial to life as cooking a meal, and he always gave his best at everything he did. She hoped that he could live his dream soon. He was a great musician and he deserved to be recognized for it, he deserved to give his best at what he really wanted to do. 
And then… what about her? 
Ámbar paused with her pen in hand. It wasn’t like being the manager of the Roller was her life dream. After this job was over… what would she do with her life? What did she want to do? 
She spent some minutes looking at the document in front of her, pretending to read it while actually contemplating life. 
A presence came up to her table.
“Hey, Ámbar.” 
Ámbar looked up, snapping out of her thoughts. She was immediately surprised. This was unexpected. 
“Can I talk to you?” Matteo asked her, hesitant, probably because he also knew how unusual this was. “As in, in private?”  
Ámbar’s brows drew together a little. “Uh… Sure.” It was a strange request but she saw no reason to say no. It wasn’t like she was being very productive at the moment. 
She stood from her seat and Matteo walked towards the dressing room, so she followed him there. Once inside, she closed the door behind her. “What’s up?” 
“Well, first of all, I wanted to say that I really like your Día de los Muertos idea for a Roller Jam,” Matteo said. “We were all worried, to be honest, when you first became the Roller’s manager, but I gotta admit, you’ve come up with very good things since then, and I think you deserve some credit.” 
Ámbar blinked. Okay… had she entered some alternate dimension without her knowing or something? Why was Matteo telling her this? “Wow, um, thank you…? I’m doing my best to be the best manager I can be,” she said. 
“Of course, of course. And the best girlfriend you can be too,” Matteo added, this time jokingly. “Should I be offended that you never threw an Italian party for me while we were dating? Nor did you do it for Benicio. Now that I think about it—Do you know if Simón has any Italian heritage? Maybe you have a type.”
She liked him better when he was being formal and appreciative. 
“I’m trying to forget I ever dated you, and Benicio was nothing more than a momentary lapse of judgment,” she said coolly. “Now, is there a point to this conversation?”
Matteo looked nervous again. “Right. Yes. I, um… I wanted to ask you for a favor.” 
Of course. “And what would that be?”  
“Would it be possible for me to perform a song at the Roller Jam?” 
Ámbar frowned a little. “Um… I mean, Simón and Luna are gonna sing one, but you’re not from México, Matteo. Why do you wanna sing? To promote your new song?”  
Matteo averted his gaze, hesitant. “I’m not from México…” He said slowly, “…but Luna is.”
Ámbar’s brows shot to her hairline and her jaw dropped. 
“I wanna do a surprise for her,” Matteo said fast while she snorted in disbelief, “so if you could also not tell anyone that I’ll be singing, that’d be great. It’d only be one song—” 
“You do realize that you’re asking me, your ex, to do a surprise for the girl you dumped me for.” 
“I broke up with you for many reasons; only one of them was Luna. And you broke up with me too— And,” he added quickly before she could refute, “didn’t you just say that you wanted to forget we ever happened?” 
She rolled her eyes. “Yeah, whatever.” 
Matteo looked away and tucked his hands in the pocket of his pants. “For what is worth… I’m sorry for how I acted during our relationship. I know I wasn’t the best boyfriend, especially the Luna thing… Though, in my defense, Gastón was the one who dared me to make her fall for me.” 
“Gastón did what?” And he had the audacity to act all goody-goody? “Oooh, I hope Nina doesn’t forgive him,” she spat. It was common knowledge to everyone with eyes that Gastón was hoping for something with Nina judging by the longing stares he sent her 24/7. After this? Ámbar was tempted to introduce her to another guy herself. 
“Hey, I was the one who listened to him.” 
“I know,” she told him with a glare; he wasn’t even subtle about it. 
A flash of shame passed across Matteo’s face much to Ámbar’s satisfaction. Good. Now they could lay this whole thing to rest. “Thank you for the apology,” she said in a kinder tone. “You’re two years late, but I guess it’s better than never.” 
“Well, with the way you were acting, I didn’t feel much like apologizing to you.” 
She glared at him again. Fair. Didn’t mean she had to admit it. 
“You’re still asking me for a favor, remember?” She said. That shut him up. “And I was not the only one insufferable— In fact…” She crossed her arms in front of her chest. “What about Simón?” 
Matteo frowned. “What about him?” 
“Well, you were unfaithful to me, but you antagonized him for two years straight, including when you publicly humiliated him in that Vidia interview. Did you apologize to him?” She asked with indignation.
Matteo stared at her for a moment with a silly face. “Wow. Who would’ve thought you’d ever get this defensive over someone other than yourself.” 
“Matteo.” 
He sighed, getting back to the point. “I tried, some time ago. He didn’t let me. He told me to forget about it, that it was all in the past. That I’m a different person now and he is happy we’re friends.” 
Ámbar deflated and face-palmed. “Of course, he did.” She looked to the side with mild annoyance. “I can’t believe I’ll have to get angry in his stead for the rest of my life.” 
“Or… you could learn from him and don’t hold grudges,” Matteo suggested. 
Ámbar looked at him like he was insane. “Do you even know me at all?” She extended her hand in greeting. “Hi, Ámbar Smith, we dated for years, do you recall?”  
Matteo laughed slightly, and for a moment it looked like that would be all— they’d buried the hatched, finally. But then his face clouded with worry. “You’re treating him right, right?” 
For the second time in this conversation, Ámbar’s jaw dropped to the underworld. “Oh my god, I can not believe this— Another couple’s counselor!” She threw her hands up. “They’re just everywhere these days!” 
Matteo frowned confusedly. “Another?” 
“I’m not gonna talk about my relationship with you Matteo,” Ámbar told him in all seriousness. 
“I just wanted to make sure—” She gave him a pointed look. “Okay, fine, I get it,” he backed off. He stared at her. “So…” 
“So?” 
“Can I perform at the Roller Jam?” 
Ah right, that. 
Ámbar narrowed her eyes, calculating. 
“You would owe me a big favor,” she started. “Immediate the moment I call it in; non-negotiable. If I decide I want you to repay me by singing ‘Pocket full of sunshine’ dressed in a bright yellow duck costume in front of the whole Roller, you do it.” 
Fear flickered in Matteo’s eyes. “…Simón wouldn’t let you do that to me.” 
Ámbar smiled. “Simón would be the first to want to see that.” 
Matteo remained quiet. 
Ámbar offered him her hand, smiling wide and devilishly. “Do we have a deal?”  
Matteo looked at her hand with clear reluctance and sighed. He shook it. “Deal. But please have mercy.” 
Oh, how she loved having power over someone. 
“I make no promises.” 
******************
As tedious as handling the lockers could be sometimes, there were occasions in which the peace and quiet could be very useful. Lately, for Simón, the downtimes in this room had been the perfect opportunity to work on new songs. 
He spun his pen around in his hand, staring down at the words he’d written on his notepad. 
Es la fuerza que golpea fuerte al corazón
La fuerza incalculable que hay en una canción
Un volcán de cosas buenas que entra en erupción 
That was it, those were all the lyrics he had for now for this song. He couldn’t even call it a song yet. It was more like a concept, but he liked it, so he’d written it down so he wouldn’t forget. They had other songs in the making with Pedro currently, more romantic ones, some fast, some slow. Those were far more developed than this, so maybe, he thought, he should be working on finishing those instead of pondering over random words that came to him, but who was he to question inspiration? Nothing would ever start if he did. 
Not like he was having much luck at coming up with anything beyond these three verses. But, well, that wasn’t unusual. 
He had the beginnings of a melody though, like a tiny spark that if he managed to fuel enough could turn into a full-blown bonfire. He started humming and left his pen on the counter. Maybe focusing on the melody first was the way to go for this one.  
Loud, sharp footsteps and voices snapped him out of his reverie and made him turn his head to the left just as a woman stormed in, followed closely by a glaringly worried Eric who looked like he’d sprinted to reach her.  
Simón remembered this woman. She had come in here with her son only 15 minutes earlier or so.
He did not remember her glaring at him like this back then. 
The woman seethed. “You.” 
Simón abandoned all thoughts of lyrics and music. 
This was not good. 
*****************
Ámbar had just sat down mere minutes ago when the commotion reached her. 
She lifted her head from her papers just in time to see a woman furiouslywalking up to her. She was pulling a little boy by the hand with her, and Simón and Eric appeared right behind them, concern on their faces. 
The woman looked middle-aged or maybe younger. She had short, dark blond hair and wore a wine-colored open cardigan over a black floral top. A mom look if she had ever seen one. She stood right in front of Ámbar’s table, her whole stance one of outrage. “You’re the manager?”
Ámbar straightened up and stood from her seat immediately. “Yes, is there a problem?”
“My son just fell down in the middle of the rink because the skates you provided had stuck wheels,” the woman fumed. She showed her the skates in question, lifting them momentarily with her free hand. “Look at him, he could’ve broken something for your negligence! How is this possible?!” 
Ámbar gave a good look to the boy next to her. He didn’t look older than eleven. The resemblance with his mother was obvious in the matching sand blond hair and features. He was wearing a Spiderman t-shirt and jean shorts, which left in plain sight his bleeding right elbow and knee. He looked like he’d been crying. 
Ámbar swallowed and stretched out her hand. “Can I see the skates?” 
The woman handed her the skates and Ámbar checked the wheels immediately, swiping them down with her right hand to make them spin. Indeed, two wheels weren’t working, one on each skate— They were completely tightened up. 
“See?” The woman said with indignation. “Who wouldn’t fall with skates like that? My son has been rollerskating since he was five years old— He never would’ve fallen if it weren’t for those things!”
Ámbar could’ve pointed out that even professionals fall sometimes in this sport, that skating of any kind comes hand in hand with falling, but she gathered it was in her best interest to not agitate this woman even more. 
She looked at Eric, who was standing by the tables in front of the stage, watching everything that was happening with a worried expression. And he was not the only one— Delfi and Jazmín were a few tables over there, not to mention at least four other customers who were listening to all of this. This was bad. 
“Eric, could you please bring the emergency kit from the dressing room? Quickly.” Seeing him following her command, Ámbar looked back at the woman. “I’m so sorry this happened,” she said, heartfelt. “You can treat his wounds here, you should have everything you need.” 
The woman only looked offended. “And you think that is enough? Look at my son!” The kid’s gaze was on the floor, looking like he wanted to be anywhere else but there as his wounds shone bright red. “I will not allow this establishment to work like this! I want restitution and I want that boy fired!” 
She pointed her finger at Simón, who was standing close to the bar. His face paled, and Ámbar’s heart jumped to her throat. “If he goes around handing defective skates, I don’t want to even imagine how many more people have gotten hurt! Do you even train your employees in this establishment?!” 
Ámbar’s heart was pounding in her chest. She’d never had to deal with a situation like this. Sure, she’d gotten many scoldings from her godmother over the years, but this was different. She was the authority figure here, she was the one that was supposed to have everything in control, she was the one who had to take responsibility and fix this because it was her job, her subordinates, her establishment. 
The woman’s attitude annoyed her. Her suggestion that the Roller as a whole sucked annoyed her. ‘Train their employees’?  No one had trained her in how to become a manager— they just threw the position onto her hands and now she had to deal with this.   
Ámbar clenched her hands, the only crack in her composure she would allow, the only outlet for her nervousness she’d concede. She had a problem at hand and she had to find a solution. Anything else could come later.
“I can assure you that measures will be taken so that something like this never happens again,” she spoke conciliatorily, with all the professionalism she could muster. “The well-being of our customers is our number one priority. As for restitution, if it’s alright with you, you and your son can order anything you want in the cafeteria, free of charge.” Eric approached her then, handing her the emergency kit she’d requested. Ámbar offered it to the woman. “Here, you can treat him while you wait for your orders.” 
The woman was still in a huff but she accepted the medical box and followed Pedro as he led them to a table on the other side of the Roller. 
Simón went to Ámbar when they were out of earshot. 
“Ámbar, I swear I don’t know how it happened,” he said, earnest, distressed. “I check the skates and do maintenance every day— Those wheels should’ve been fine.” 
“Are you certain you checked every single one of them?” She asked.
“Yes.” 
“Absolutely sure?” 
“Yes!” He repeated, slightly exasperated. Tensions were running high and she could see in his face that her not immediately believing him hurt, but she had to ask, it was her job. 
Ámbar looked at the woman on the other side of the cafeteria. She was treating the kid’s wounds. Pedro walked over, returning to the bar, probably to prepare whatever beverage or meal they had asked for. 
“Pedro,” she called him over. “Come here for a bit.” She looked to the side. “Eric, you too.” 
She rounded up the three guys in front of her.
“New policy,” she declared. “Each time you supply rental skates, you will check the wheels right at the moment you hand them out, in front of the client’s eyes. Understood?” 
They all nodded. “Yes, Ámbar.” 
“Good.” 
Eric raised his hand shyly. “Um, what will happen with the woman?” He asked with apprehension. “She told you to fire Simón, but you’re not going to do that, right?” 
Two tables over, Jazmín snorted. “She’s not gonna fire her own boyfriend.” Delfi shot her a look. “What? We were all thinking it.” 
Ámbar glanced at Simón and her heart fell at how ashamed he looked. 
She shot a glare at Jazmín but kept her voice professional. “I will do no such thing because it’d be too extreme for an isolated event in which no real harm was done.” She fumed. “That woman should be grateful I even let her order for free because his son only got a scratched elbow and knee, and nothing assures me that he wouldn’t have fallen just as bad on his own even with perfectly good skates.” 
Everyone stayed silent, subdued by the tension that permeated the air.
Ámbar sighed. “Anyway, you’re dismissed, get back to work. Pedro, once you have the total of the woman’s order, you bring the receipt to me, okay?” 
“Yes, Ámbar.” He walked away. 
She turned. “And Jazmín, please, don’t make a video out of this.” 
Jazmín pouted. “But it’s so—”
“No. It would reflect badly on the Jam & Roller. I assume you don’t want anything to happen to this place?” Jazmín looked chastised. “That’s what I thought.”
Everything else handled, she walked toward Simón, who was still standing by the bar. 
“Take the rest of the day off, okay?” She told him gently. “We’ll talk later, don’t worry.” 
Simón just nodded and walked away, his gaze not meeting hers at all. Ámbar wished she could go with him, he looked really affected by this, but she still had a situation to deal with. 
Drawing in a breath, she squared up her shoulders and got back to work.  
****************
To be honest, Gastón had all but assumed by now that her answer was no. 
He knew he should have some hope, but a big part of him had seen the calendar move forward, the day before his flight arrive, and gathered that, if he left tomorrow without Nina saying anything, wasn’t that answer enough? There was still time, yes, but he couldn’t stop the calamitous thoughts swirling through his brain, telling him that she could just not have the heart to tell him no directly and so she was just waiting for him to leave as a way to soften the blow. 
Maybe that’d be okay. He had put her in an uncomfortable position to begin with— Maybe it was fair for it to end in whichever way she found easier. 
That was what he’d been thinking until he got her texts. 
‘Can we talk this afternoon? I have my answer.’
Gastón’s heart had leaped to his throat. It still seemed to be there now, as he made his way to the park where they decided to meet, the same one where they had… where he had called things off. He couldn’t help but wonder if that meant something. 
He tried to steady himself as he walked toward their meeting place. Whatever Nina’s answer was, he had to take it, good or bad. He wished he had an inkling of what to expect. During the past few days they’d talked some, but only in passing and with their friends around. He had no idea what was going through her head, and he wished that every single glance he saw her exchange with Eric, every single word or smile, didn’t make him assume the worst, but they did.
The thing was, regardless of what Nina chose, his life would carry on the same way. He would still miss her every minute of every day. The only difference would be in the quality of that pain— It could either be bittersweet, or a dark void he’d had to pull himself out of. 
As Gastón neared the appointed spot, he saw Nina in the distance, sitting on a bench already, her hands joined together on her lap. She saw him too and stood, waiting as he approached. She was wearing a cute navy-blue dress; a cardigan and black tights for the cold. 
She looked pretty. 
She always looked pretty. 
“Hi,” she said when he reached her.  
She was smiling, even if nervously. That was a good sign, right? 
“Hi,” he said back, and ran a hand over the back of his neck. “Um, I didn’t get the time wrong, did I? Did you wait long for me?” 
Nina’s eyes widened. “Nonono, I just got here a few minutes ago,” she reassured him. “I— I was too nervous and couldn’t stay still,” she admitted, “and, by the time I realized it, I was already here.” 
He cracked a small smile. “I get the feeling.” He couldn’t blame the weather for the sweat on his palms after all. 
There was a little silence which he took the lead to break. “Um, should we sit or…?” 
Nina looked at the bench. “Um, no, like this is fine.” 
Gastón’s heart fell. That had to be a bad sign. 
“Okay,” he said either way.  
The park they were in was very frequented by high schoolers and kids in the early hours of the afternoon, but thankfully, it was almost empty this close to the evening. Gastón wouldn’t like to be seen by any bystanders right now. Was the nervous energy between them as painfully obvious as he felt it? If anyone passed by right now, could they tell his heart was crashing against his ribs?  
The lack of people made the silence between them even more evident. A silence which both of them tried to break at the same time. 
“You first,” Gastón said after the mishap. 
“Nono, you go first, it’s fine,” Nina told him.  
Gastón changed his weight from one foot to the other. “Well… Nothing, I just…” He took a breath and mustered the strength to look her in the eyes. “I just wanted to say that, whatever your decision is, I respect it. I won’t be mad or anything, it’s alright.” Eventually, it would be. 
Nina looked down, nervous. “Well, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking these past few days…” She was fidgeting with her hands. “And I think that…” Her eyes looked at his, just for a moment. Then they drifted. To his jacket, to a spot behind him. “…considering our history, the statistics and all that, the chance of us working out long distance is very low.” 
Oh.
The air seemed knocked out of his lungs. “Oh.” 
So he had hope until now. 
Gastón had seen withered plants before. He never thought he’d ever feel like one.
“Because, I mean, we already tried it once, and it didn’t work,” Nina said, more quickly. Maybe it was a new tactic; rip it off like a Band-Aid, make the pain last less. “Repeating the same factors in the same conditions and expecting a different result is not… very realistic.” 
Gastón focused on breathing through the growing lump in his throat. “Right,” he managed to say. His voice came out weaker than he would’ve liked, but at least it sounded steady. 
He wanted to scream that it wasn’t the same. That he wasn’t the same. That he knew better now. That he’d never make the mistake of letting her go again. 
He gulped. Gulped it all down. “Yeah, I suppose you’re right.” 
His head was in disarray. Now what? What was he supposed to say? He had to reassure her, probably. It’s okay, I understand, he had to say.He had to say it. He willed the words to leave his mouth. It’s okay, I understand, can we still be—? 
“But I don’t care.” 
Gastón blinked. He realized that at some point his gaze had fallen, because when he brought it back up, he found Nina’s eyes, staring directly at him. She wasn’t fidgeting, she wasn’t looking at his shoes— Her eyes were on his. 
They stayed on his. 
“I don’t care,” she said again, determined, light, with the beginning of a smile pulling on her lips. “My heart doesn’t care if it’s impossible or if it’s a one-in-a-million chance— I want to be with you.” She moved closer. “Even if it means only talking to you through the phone or seeing you in a screen, I want to be with you, Gastón. Because I love you. So much. And I need to give my heart a chance of being happy. I need to know if this could work. And… and if it doesn’t, well, I tried. We tried. But I won’t give up without having given it my all.” 
The words fell from her lips like light itself; bright, hopeful, and heartfelt. Her eyes were shining. Maybe she herself was light. 
Gastón had been wrong before. She wasn’t just pretty— She was dazzling. 
A soft smile grew on his face. “I always knew you were braver than me, Nina Simonetti.” 
He took the final step towards her and cradled her face in his hands. 
“I promise that this time I’ll give it my all too.” He stared into her eyes and her hands went to hold the back of his own. “Because if there is one thing in this world that is worth it, it’s you.” 
Nina smiled. She smiled big, with teeth and all, and her eyes were a little wet, making them shine brighter. 
Gastón could’ve stared at them forever, but there was something else more pressing. 
Nina surged to meet him when he leaned down for her lips. The wave of warmth and affection that flooded him couldn’t be put into words— There was nothing that could describe the utter joy, relief, love that filled his chest and spread through his veins at the feeling of her mouth pressing against his, soft and perfect. He had missed kissing her too much. He had missed her too much. 
Her arms wrapped around his neck and his circled her waist, holding her close. 
No more names in the sea— No more fate. They would make their own destiny, because this was something worth fighting against all odds. 
*******************
When Simón was accused, back in Cancún, of having taken money out of the register, it’d been an unpleasant moment but he didn’t worry too much because he knew it was Benicio and not him who did something wrong. 
When that customer had come to confront him that afternoon, he hadn’t known what to do. Anything he said sounded like an excuse and she didn’t stop to listen to him much either. Simón only remembered feeling this humiliated after the Vidia interview, but even then he’d had someone to blame, and the option to escape the situation. This time, he had neither. 
Simón walked straight to the mansion after Ámbar released him from work, not in the mood to do anything else. Only when he arrived did he hesitate. Usually, he always went to Ámbar’s room, but this time, he didn’t know if he should do it. He’d caused trouble for her today. A customer had yelled at her today because of him, and he couldn’t even give explanations because he didn’t think he was guilty, but he felt guilty— It was hard not to when that woman kept pointing at him and demanding he be punished for his failure. 
‘She’s not gonna fire her own boyfriend.’  
That only made him feel worse; he shouldn’t get any special treatment. 
In the end, Simón waited for Ámbar in her room anyway. She’d told him they would talk later and it seemed like a cowardly move to make her walk all the way to his guest room to find him. He took a shower to relax a bit and put on some comfortable clothing he kept in Ámbar’s room. He had like two drawers for himself now. At that moment, he didn’t know if that was nice or if it made him feel like an intruder. 
He turned on the TV but he was too anxious to really pay attention to what was happening on the screen. Mostly, it just added background noise to his worries. He turned it off immediately when Ámbar walked in two hours later. He didn’t know what to expect. He thought maybe she’d be angry at him or act awkwardly around him because of what happened, but much to his surprise, Ámbar greeted him like normal. She sat next to him on the bed’s edge and asked how he’d spent his free afternoon. He recounted what little he’d done with uncertainty still hanging over him. 
It didn’t take long for Ámbar to show that she was angry— At the customer. 
“…she ordered more food than they could eat and asked for it to be packed to go— That woman was a freaking leach,” she was currently venting, telling him how she’d spent the rest of her afternoon. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d even suspect she tightened the wheels herself. Of course, money is not an issue, but it annoys me that I have to pull money out of my own wallet for that woman.” 
Simón, who’d been listening with his gaze down, lifted his head upon hearing that. “Yours?” He said, appalled. “No, you don’t need to pay for it, I thought it’d be discounted from my salary.”
Ámbar’s brows drew together. “That wouldn’t be fair, you didn’t do anything.” 
Simón scoffed weakly. “Exactly.” 
She held his hands and looked at him earnestly. “No, seriously, my love, I know it wasn’t you. Or any of the guys.”
It was Simón’s turn to frown. “How do you know that?” Had any new information come to light after he was gone? 
Ámbar let go of his hands and sighed, looking away from him. Her face looked glum suddenly, like whatever her answer was was not something she wanted to say. “You hadn’t arrived in Buenos Aires yet,” she started, “but did Luna ever tell you that she fell during her test to be the rink assistant because the skates they gave her were defective?” 
Simón felt like he was stuck in a state of confusion by this point. He hadn’t expected the conversation to go this way. He tried to remember. “…Yeah, now that you mention it, I vaguely recall that.”
“Well…” Ámbar brought her hand together on her lap. “The reason why that skate had a stuck wheel was that I tightened it in secret right before her test.”  
His face must have shown his utter bafflement because Ámbar turned to face him quickly, making placating gestures with her hands. “I know, I know, it was wrong, she could’ve broken something— I just really hated her at the time. I lowkey hoped she broke something.” 
“Ámbar!” 
“I’m sorry, okay?” She said painfully. “I can’t change what I did, but I promise I won’t do anything like that again. Not to her, not to anyone.” 
Simón schooled his aghast expression, although he was still reeling from her admission, but he could see the earnest look in her eyes and he believed her. 
“Anyway, that experience shows me that it’s actually very possible for someone to sneak into the lockers, tinkle with some skates, and leave with no one being the wiser.” 
“You’re saying that’s what happened now?” He asked. “But who would do that?”
Ámbar scoffed. “Who else? Benicio and Emilia, of course,” she said, pissed off. “Or one of them, I don’t know. But it was at least one of them, I’m sure of it.” 
Annoyance flared inside Simón as well. He shook his head in disbelief, at both them and himself for not thinking of that before— God, it was so obvious. “I can’t believe them, what did they gain from this?”
“Bother you, bother me, or maybe they just get off on wreaking havoc,” Ámbar said, and bent down to discard her boots. 
Simón looked at her. “Why don’t you ban them from the Roller?” After this, she had to, right? 
Ámbar sighed, sitting criss-cross on the bed. “I thought about it, but I can’t,” she said regretfully. “I don’t have proof that they did anything and, even though the Red Sharks team doesn’t exist anymore, Vidia knows them. I’m…” She looked to the side, “honestly scared of what they could say to my superiors if I try to ban them.” 
Any lingering annoyance, tension, or worry from the day’s events evaporated at the look on her face. Simón reached over to hold her hand in his own. “You’re scared they might fire you,” he realized. 
“Yeah.” She looked at their joined hands. “I mean, this is not my ideal job or anything. But the Roller is my ideal place. Or, it used to be, at least. It was more of a home to me than my own house for years. So it feels kinda… special, to me, to be the manager now. I guess I just don’t… want that to end on bad terms.”
He ran his thumb up and down the back of her hand, taking in her words. He smiled. “From queen of the rink to manager… I don’t know if that’s a big leap or merely a formality.” 
That drew a smile from Ámbar. 
They spent some time like that in comfortable silence. After a moment, Simón moved a little closer to her, still holding her hand. 
“Can I ask you something?” He said quietly.
She looked at him. “Of course.”  
He hesitated for a second longer, thinking how to formulate the question. “Why… If everyone admired you already as the queen of the rink, why did you pick on Luna? Why did you choose to antagonize her so much?” 
Ámbar’s face dimmed. She looked down.  
“I just don’t understand how you could already hate her so much as to want to hurt her when she had just arrived here,” he said, gently, trying not to make her feel attacked in any way; he just wanted some clarity. “I… I never truly understood why you ever hated Luna in the first place. You explained to me the thing about the Red Sharks Festival and why you were so pissed at her party at the beginning of the year. But everything before that… Why was it?” 
He’d been wanting to ask this for a while. He had pieces, and he thought he knew a little, but he would never fully understand if she didn’t talk to him. He wouldn’t force her, of course. He’d considered just leaving it in the past and not mentioning it since it’d been a while since Ámbar’s attitude changed, but now, after what she’d confessed to him, he felt it was the right time to ask and see if she’d explain. Just for closure. Just to understand her better. 
Ámbar took a breath and let it out slowly— a soft, long sigh that seemed to give her strength just as much as it snuffed all the energy she ever had. 
“Well, Matteo was a factor,” she started, and her tone could’ve been mistaken for indifference if he didn’t know her better than that. “It was obvious from the beginning that he liked Luna, and that hurt, but… it hurt combined with everything else. Because it wasn’t just Matteo that liked her immediately— She was so easily liked by everyone. I had worked so hard to build my image and my popularity, and in just a matter of days, it was like everything revolved around her.” She grimaced. “I know it sounds like just petty jealousy but…” Her gaze stayed down, but even then he could see the cloud of something cover her face. It was a moment before she let the words out. “I had nothing.” 
Finally, the aching sadness hiding in her voice came to light between them, and it was like a knife in Simón’s chest. 
“If I wasn’t the queen of the rink, I had nothing,” she continued. “If I wasn’t the best at everything then people didn’t admire me, and if people didn’t admire me then… what did I have?” 
Simón’s throat tightened. It absolutely broke his heart how matter-of-factly she said all this, like it was a truth she’d known her whole life, and it weighed on her, left her void until he feared she’d vanish before his eyes.  
Where was Sharon? He wanted to say, to complain. He felt a spark of rage in a dark corner of himself he usually tried to deny existed. Where was this woman that she allowed Ámbar to feel so alone in the world? Where did she get off trying to ruin everyone’s lives and then running off, abandoning all her responsibilities? Why was it so hard for her to show Ámbar a mere speck of love? 
“I had Delfi and Jazmín, I guess,” Ámbar answered herself before he could say or do anything. Simón felt so powerless; frozen as he processed her grief. “We didn’t have the best friendship in the world, but… I should’ve appreciated them more.”  A moment passed and she straightened a bit, shaking herself slightly. “Whatever, it’s… that’s it. I felt like Luna was taking everything from me. My house, my boyfriend, my place in the Roller… so I wanted to take everything away from her too. I wanted her to hurt like I did.” 
Simón had seen the dark flame of anger and resentment in Ámbar’s face before. Many times, even before he got to really know her. This was the first time that seeing it hurt. 
He tightened his hold on her hand, the only thing he dared to do to not disrupt her. He didn’t agree with hurting Luna, of course not, but she already knew that and there was no need to say it. What he wanted her to know was I hear you, I’m with you. 
Ámbar met his eyes and the shadow of rancor faded away into a resigned smile; a tiny, sad thing. She shrugged weakly.  “But whatever I tried didn’t work. All I achieved was to make my life more miserable. I lost all my friends, I lost you…” Her gaze fell to their hands. A tiny smile appeared on her face again, but this time it came with a softness in her eyes.  “But for some inexplicable reason, even when I was at my worst times, you still had faith in me.” 
She reached over and held his hand between both of hers. “You saw I could be better under all that rage and that pain, and eventually, I started believing it too. And I realized that, although Luna shook my life forever… there was nothing I could do to change that. I didn’t get anything from raging at her being Sol Benson. I didn’t get anything from making her suffer, because even if it satisfied me somewhat, my life didn’t get any better because of it— In fact, it only seemed to get worse. So, I let it go,” she said with a light tone. “I let go of that rage I had for things I couldn’t change and Luna also couldn’t change.” She shrugged. “And here I am.” 
The lightness felt almost out of place after everything that had been said, but it was still a relief to see Ámbar okay, at ease, after how much she’d suffered. Simón almost didn’t want to— it felt too much of a solemn moment— but he found himself growing a tiny smile. He was so proud of her. For living all she went through and not letting it pull her under. For turning her life around against all her learned behaviors and finding the best version of herself. 
“Her little goody-two-shoes act still irks me sometimes though.”  
Yep, definitely still herself. 
Simón gave her a look, but there was no bite to it. “It’s not an act; she’s genuinely a good person.”
Ámbar waved it away half-heartedly. “Yeah, yeah, whatever.”  
He played with the fabric of his sweatpants. “So… can I assume you two won’t fight anymore?”
“Can I assume she’ll stop being annoying?” 
She rolled her eyes at the look on his face and held his shoulder with her free hand. “I’m kidding. I promise I’m not gonna antagonize your best friend anymore. We’re actually on pretty decent terms now. And even if we weren’t, I’d never put you in that position. You’re worth more to me than any rivalry I could have with anyone.” 
A surge of affection squeezed his heart. Simón brought her into his arms and hugged her tightly. “Thank you.” He pulled back to look at her. “Truly. For telling me all this. For trusting me, and for giving Luna a chance. It means a lot to me.” 
She held the back of his neck. “You mean a lot to me. So everything that’s important to you, it’s important to me too.” Her hand slid to cup his cheek. “There’s very little in this world I wouldn’t do for you, Simón.” 
His chest hurt again. His whole interior twisted and tore apart as if she had clawed him open, but it was the best feeling in the world. 
Simón pulled her close and kissed her. “I love you.” 
Ámbar smiled. “I love you too.” 
********************
Ever since Juliana came back, the Roller guys were more insufferable than ever. 
Benicio was sitting in the cafeteria, nursing a glass of juice as he waited for Emilia to start their morning practice. Lately, everywhere he looked he could see the losers’ smiling faces, hear their ridiculous laughs over the stupidest things, and worst of all, he had to live knowing they used his rink every afternoon. 
Benicio clenched his jaw. He missed the old days. He missed seeing the logo of the Red Sharks followed by his picture on the screens.  But no matter. People would respect them eventually. Everyone would come to know he was the best, one way or another. 
He tapped his fingers idly on the table, switching between looking at his phone and throwing glances at the entrance of the Roller. Waiting would be more fun if he could look at Ámbar while at it, maybe get a rinse out of her— she looked so gorgeous when she got mad— but for some reason, she wasn’t at her usual table today. Maybe she would arrive later. Or maybe he was the one too late to catch a glimpse of her before she went out somewhere. 
The next time he lifted his head to check if Emilia had arrived, it wasn’t her nor Ámbar who he saw. Simón was marching towards him before he was even aware of his presence on the other end of the Roller. He stood in front of him with an accusatory look just as Benicio left his phone on the table. 
“I know it was you and Emilia who tightened those skates.” 
Benicio repressed the urge to smirk. Oh yeah, that had been a masterstroke on his part. At first, he’d been dubious about how much of an uproar such a small thing could cause, but it was just a matter of choosing the right target. Oh, how he would’ve loved to stay there yesterday to watch it all go down, but it was too risky, so he and Emilia left when the woman marched to berate Ámbar. 
“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” he responded innocently.  
Simón scoffed. “You’re always like that; throwing the stone and hiding your hand, blaming others. Even back in Mexico. You’re a coward, Benicio.”
“Don’t project on me, Simón,” he said simply. He laid back on his chair, his hands clasped together casually on the table. Maybe he had to look up at him due to their positions, but he was the true superior one here. “Whatever problem you had doing your job has nothing to do with me. And, I mean, why do you even worry? You have your little girlfriend to defend you. Oh, right, your boss, sorry.” 
Simón shook his head, staring at him with a mix of annoyance and incredulity. “You’re just never going to stop, are you?” He said. “Does seeing me with Ámbar really make you that jealous? Well, pity, because that’s not going to change.” A smile full of hostility and condescension appeared on his face. “All your little stunt with the skates achieved was that we had a very deep conversation and now we’re closer than ever. So, thank you. And give my thanks to Emilia as well, okay?” 
Benicio tightened the grip of his hands until it hurt. Simón placed his hands on the table and leaned closer, dropping the fake smile. “Stop wasting your time and don’t cause any more trouble for Ámbar or you’ll be dealing with me,” he said sharply, his expression dark and serious. “If you really cared about her, that’d be the minimum you would do.” 
Simón stormed away, not deigning him with the luxury of a comeback.
Benicio stayed in his seat, festering in his anger. 
Simón could laugh all he wanted now but Ámbar would be his in the end. Step by step, he would make sure of it. 
..
.
------------------
Okay I’m sorry for pointing this out myself but it’s so funny because: 
Simón: Ámbar is so much cooler than me, she’s seen the world, her default is luxury, she’s smart, she’s driven, she’s gonna go out there and eat the world up and I’m gonna be here waiting tables. 
Ámbar: Simón is so cool, he knows so many things that I have no idea about, I don’t know how he manages to be a waiter, I wouldn’t have the patience for it, and with a smile no less! He always gives his best, I admire him so much, I hope someday I can be half the person he is. 
🤣🤣🤣🤣
Also, how ironic is it that me, the writer, realized this juxtaposition just now as I was writing it? 😂 Like, I didn’t plan on Ámbar having that introspection moment there, it just happened, and then I went… oh. skjfdnskf. Simón, my boy. He had a rough time today but it ended on a high note <3 He’ll miss that eventually.  
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rainmustfallts4 · 2 months ago
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Simblr Ask Game by Amelie
Original Post Here
Yes I know it's an ask game but these are fun to answer lmao
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🌸 What's your earliest memory of playing the sims?
My earliest memory is playing Sims 3 and visiting the future. I know that’s not actually my earliest experience, but my memory is very bad and this is the earliest I can remember. I definitely remember going outside the city and collecting parts(?) to unlock some spaceship or underground bunker. I forget.
💫 How did you discover the sims franchise?
I honestly have no idea lol Maybe just seeing it in the store and it seemed fun?
🍇 What was your first sims game?
Again, poor memory here lol I think I may have started with the Sims 3 base game?
🍦 How long have you been playing the sims?
Many many years lol Pretty sure I’ve been playing since the Sims 3 came out at the very least. So… about 15 years?
🧋 What is your favorite sims series? (sims 3, 2 etc.)
Sims 4 c: I actually hated this game when it first came out because it was so different from 3. I remember saying I would never get into 4 and would never stop playing 3 yet here I am.
🤍 Do you have a favorite sim created by you?
I’m honestly terrible at creating sims so I don’t have many that I’m proud of or really like. I have to say, though, I adore Bryon Rainhawk <3
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🧸 Favorite townie? (any sims game)
Kiyoshi, Caleb, Vlad, Night Wraith and Morgyn Ember are my favorites c: At least that I can think of right now~
🍨 Do you have a sim self? If yes, do you play with them?
Tiger Rain, the sim you see in my Super Sim challenge, is sort of like me. But again, I’m terrible at making sims and every time I asked if she looked like me, people always said no. Eventually, I gave up and just made her a mix of me and what I wish I looked like. And yes! As stated, she’s the main star of my Super Sim challenge and I often use her in other challenges/scenarios.
🫐 How often do you play the sims?
I try to play every day. However, I’ve got commitment issues! I’ll be obsessed with one thing for months, then that obsession will switch to something else. So, right now, I’m obsessed with the sims and that's all I’m doing. Eventually, I will move on to something else for a few months, then something else and eventually I’ll make it back to the sims lol
🌱 Do/Can you relate to any of your sims?
I’m pretty boring, honestly. Though I do tend to make them similar to me in some ways, they live far more interesting and better lives than I do, even through all the torture haha
🐬 Favorite sims challenge?
I’ve only finished one challenge as of the date I’m writing this. I’ve attempted many over the years, some a few times. I can’t really think of any that stand out above the rest. Maybe the Asylum challenge?
👜 What in-game career would you choose if you were a sim?
Writer and Paranormal Investigator!
🌷 Which traits would you have if you were a sim?
Creative, geek, loves outdoors, loner, socially awkward.
🍮 Favorite thing to do in the sims? (Could literally be anything!)
In the game itself? Hmm, that’s a tough one. I’m quite fond of collecting things and trying out small, forgotten features that I’ve never done before! There’s so much to do in this game with all the packs, most of it overlooked.
❄️ Favorite in-game season if you own The Sims 4 Seasons?
Fall/Autumn, 100%. There is nothing better than red and orange leaves floating on a chilly breeze. And don’t even get me started on Halloween!
❣️ Do you talk about the sims with any of your friends/family members in real life?
No :( Sadly I only have a few people to talk to about it. They’re online and I'm not technically friends with most of them so we don’t talk often. Mostly, I just scream my thoughts about the sims into the void or at my vice-cultleader Meg lol
✉️ How big is your mods folder?
Very small. I don’t mind mods, but I’m the type to prefer games as they were intended. I only use the MCCC mod, some eyes CC, a uniform CC and colorful berry skins CC. I have been thinking about adding a taco stand and a tennis court, though.
☘️ Do you have any other social media where you post sims related content?
I started posting my content on WordPress. I’m not really sure where else to post my stuff. I’ve asked around, but people usually just say tumblr.
📱 What made you want to start a simblr?
WordPress has a limit on images. Because I play so much and take so many screenshots, I have quickly arrived at nearly 60% media storage. I’ll have to pay to increase it, which I may do I don’t know yet, so I migrated to Tumblr. I have no plans of leaving but I would like to find another place where I can post my sims content (without having to pay extra.)
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shirecorn · 3 years ago
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how about 17 and 24? what inspires you and how do you deal with art block?
Long post warning.
Art block...
I don't actually get art block, which is probably a combination of neurodivergence and drawing every day for the last 3 years
I wrote an entire tutorial about how to do that, but didn't feel like illustrating it. Would people want to read it even without visuals?
Maybe... I'll just start rambling.
There's a couple different types of art block, and it's really just a philosophy puzzle to get past them. I'm going to assume that the things I think of slow days, or art mud, is a milder form of art block and work through that.
Art block is a symptom, not a disease. You probably have something deep inside that you don't want to face, or don't know how. Sometimes you need to discover the cause, sometimes just power through.
Method 1: Rest
Let yourself just Exist. The act of consuming art is part of the process. Watching shows and playing games, taking a break and going gardening or focus on school. This is what you need for burnout-induced art block.
Method 2: Action
I always choose action, sometimes it means a tiny 2 min sketch per day. Ugly or super simplified. As long as I don't stop moving.
Toss everything. Start every piece thinking you will throw it away.
The act of drawing moves you forward; pinning it to the fridge does not. Don't work things until they are perfect. Work them until they are there.
Art block causes and solutions:
- No Inspiration
Not sure what to draw, nothing seems appealing. Art won't come out like it used to.
Do studies from life or photos. Sketch, paint, digital, traditional, doesn't matter. Rocks, fruit, figure drawing, landscapes, buildings, anything.
Study and copy professional's work. Old masters are best, like rubens, michalangelo (only his men tho) etc because they will teach you anatomy while you work. If you copy someone with a lot of flaws, you will repeat those flaws.
Trace to learn, not to earn. Trace photography and art from anyone you want. Don't post it unless you have the artist's permission or they are dead, whichever comes first. This is strictly work for yourself, on yourself. It's not about the finished drawing.
Find an artist with a fun style and try converting stuff into their style. Don't make that your new style though and especially don't start selling it. Your style is a chimera of everyone you love, not a clone of one person.
Take blurry photos. You don't need a fancy camera or good skills or beautiful subjects. Doing studies from your own photos can spark life into your workflow.
Make challenges for yourself. Randomly generate things to combine. Try fusing characters! Don't try to make it look good, just be fun.
Doodle patterns, swirls, lines, random stuff. Try looking up art warmups and doing some of those.
- Everything Sucks
You finally see how bad you are. Or somehow you got worse. Every piece is a fight and you spend hours trying to get something right only for it to be stiff and disgusting and STILL wrong.
Why are you trying to draw good? It's enough just to draw.
Accept that your art is bad. Every artist can see flaws in their work. Your problem is that those flaws outweigh anything remotely worthwhile and hurt to look at.
So what? You're in a period of growth, not a period of production. Keep that wonky second eye. Let them have hot dog fingers.
Show everyone! Show no one! No piece of art can ever be a reflection of the artist. Not their worth, not their skill. The only thing your art says about you is "Held and moved a pen for a bit."
Make bad art. It's ok. Most of the time, the pressure to perform and get things Right is what made them wrong in the first place. Relax.
- No Motivation
The #1 killer of artists everywhere. On some level you think you should draw, on every other level you think you should stay in bed.
You are not lazy. You wouldn't have read this far in a post about art block if you were lazy. You wouldn't CALL it art block if you were lazy. Laziness is wishing you didn't have to do anything. A block is wishing you were doing something. If you think you can namecall Yourself into productivity again, you're wrong and You need to unionize so that you don't treat You like that anymore.
Consider Mental Illness. Losing interest in something that brought you joy can be a symptom of depression. I know it seems obvious, but if you're waiting for a sign that it's "bad enough," it's bad enough. Seek care if you have the means. Forgive yourself if you already know this.
Selfcare. Examine yourself for neglect. Nutrition, exercise, enrichment, social need, and sleep are all part of the art process. Eat three meals and sleep 8 hours. That's your gaymer fuel. You deserve it, I promise. Depriving yourself of your needs will make your blocks worse, not kick you into making them better.
Identify potholes. Sketchbook falling apart? Tablet cord frayed? Half your pencils missing? Chair uncomfortable? Desk hard to reach? There's a lot of things that you tell yourself to work around and get over. Just because you CAN workaround something, doesn't mean you SHOULD. A difficult work environment can cause secret dread deep inside that you don't recognize and just think you're lazy. What you think of as "no motivation" might actually be "I don't want to deal with my tablet disconnecting every time I move it wrong and I have to wiggle it for a few seconds to make it work again." These little things are like potholes in the road. Sure you CAN still drive through them, but eventually you're going to look up and realize you haven't voluntarily left the house in weeks.
Repair potholes and roadblocks. You might feel bad about buying a new pencil, headphones, tablet, car, etc because technically the old one works if you hustle. But if you're running into so many potholes you've ground to a halt, it doesn't Actually work anymore, does it? Invest, save up, request, and require working equipment and suitable conditions. This stuff isn't just cushy privilege, it's an investment in yourself and your art. You are worth the effort it takes to clear the way. If you can't afford reliable (reliable! not perfect or luxurious) equipment, then say it. If cardboard is all you can afford, draw on cardboard. But know that you deserve canvas, and one day you might be able to make the jump. Acknowledge that sometimes, if you don't have it in you to smear burned twigs on wet cardboard, the problem isn't motivation, but opportunity.
- Haven't Drawn in So Long
A unique type of art block that self perpetuates. The thought of starting again is so stressful you can't do it. Or maybe you'll do it tomorrow. Yeah. Tomorrow for sure.
Face your fears. Are you ashamed of your lack of drawing? Are you anthropomorphizing your paper and thinking it's going to judge you, like "oh NOW you come back >:/" I internalize voices I hear and project them onto other people, concepts, locations, and inanimate objects. Your paper, computer, WIPs folder.... none of that is judging you.
Reframe your WIPs. Do you feel shame when you see "unfinished" projects? Why? Who says you MUST bring everything you start to Finish? You don't have to. A sketch is a finished art piece; it's called a sketch! If a sketch is a fully realized creation, pages that are half colored, 75% lined, or partially rendered are all fully realized creations too. Unless paid otherwise, art is done when you're done working on it.
Lower the stakes. Draw a chibi or grab some crayons. Get messy and slowly ease yourself back into the flow over the course of a couple days. It's fine.
Get a buddy! Find an art meme, do an art trade, get a study subject, or just wing it. Drawing art alongside someone can help you get past that block.
Pretend you never stopped. Don't think about the gap, how long it's been, or rustiness. As far as anyone knows, you drew the mona lisa yesterday and didn't break a sweat. Today, you drew a starfish on your hand with a gel pen. Keep up that streak, good job!
Just keep drawing. Make a goal to do one sucky drawing per day on the back of a napkin. Don't make up for missed days, just pretend they didn't happen. Who's going to judge you? The calendar? That's pieces of paper; it doesn't have an opinion. Draw a cat on it. Done. Keeping up the momentum is a great way to prevent art blocks in the future.
TLDR: Draw imperfectly and toss it. Selfcare is king. Draw often and don't judge yourself.
Art is a process, not a product.
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wonderful-writes · 3 years ago
Text
Presume
Pairing: Tom Riddle x Fem!Reader
Summary: Tom thinks you’re too pretty to be any good at academics. You can imagine his shock when he’s proven wrong.
Word Count: 2k (2,097)
Author’s Note: The idea for this fic was given to me by @bellaswansrealgf. It was such a fun topic to write, so thank you so much bae for coming up with the idea! I’ll definitely be using more of your suggestions in the future.
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Tom Riddle found himself becoming increasingly irritated. How could Professor Slughorn possibly expect him to work with a partner? What kind of fool did Slughorn think he was? Tom was perfectly capable of completing his project himself, and it was rather insulting for his professor to assign someone to help him. And not just anyone. Slughorn had assigned you.
You, the pretty girl, were in no capacity an ideal partner. You were friendly and charming and surely too bubble-headed to know a thing about potions. You were probably irritating and selfish and vain, too. Tom would have rather been partnered up with the clown from Gryffindor than with you.
“Tom, right?” you asked as you took a seat next to him. You were dressed in neat robes and had nicely styled hair. You probably spent all morning on it.
“Yes,” he replied curtly without so much as a glance your way. He began flipping his textbook to the desired page and scanning it with his eyes.
“I’m Y/N,” you introduced.
Tom ignored you as he continued to read the page.
“So, what kind of potion do you think we should make?” you asked him, opening your own book.
Once again, Tom didn’t bother to look up or respond.
“Hello?” you tried again.
He let out an exasperated sigh. “Listen, I know potions is probably not your area of expertise, so it’s best if you just sit there and let me work.”
“Excuse me?” you asked, surprised at how this stranger could claim to already know you without having ever spoken to you. “How would you know if I’m not good at potions?”
Tom scoffed. “If you haven’t noticed, you don’t exactly look like you’d be much of an academic.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” you questioned, starting to get offended.
“Well, I’m the best in the class,” Tom said like it was the most natural thing to come out of his mouth. “Professor Slughorn probably sent you here so that I could babysit you. You can’t be any good if you need me as a mentor.”
“I don’t need you as a mentor,” you told him. “Professor Slughorn wanted us to work together for this assignment.”
“Like I said,” he replied, turning back to his book, “maybe you should let me handle the assignment.”
You were beyond aggravated. How could someone who barely knows you make such assumptions about you? You were more than adept in potions, and it was unfair of him to shut you down without letting you prove your skills.
“You realize this assignment is worth 25% of our grade, don’t you?” you asked him as you crossed your arms.
 “Precisely,” he answered. “Which is why I won’t let you mess it up.”
You had never met a more arrogant person.
“If you’re going to be this way,” you declared, “I’ll just ask Slughorn if I can work alone. I wouldn’t want to inconvenience the great Tom Riddle.”
Tom breathed a sigh of relief as you packed your belongings and walked away. You were attractive, sure, but you were also annoying. He was glad to be rid of anyone who didn’t let him take charge.
Slughorn allowed the two of you to work separately. To Tom’s approval, you set up your station far away from his. He almost pitied you. It couldn’t be easy for someone like you to complete an entire project by yourself. People like you only cared about their appearances or what the latest gossip was. There was no way you could make any of the complicated potions on the list of options for the assignment without help.
~
By the end of the week, Slughorn had finished grading the students’ potions and their accompanying essays. Tom, ever so confident in his abilities, was shocked when he didn’t receive a perfect score.
“What did I do wrong, Professor?” he asked after class had been dismissed. “I could have sworn I didn’t miss anything.”
“You forgot to crush the bay leaves before you put them in,” Slughorn explained. “But not to worry, my boy. You chose a highly complex concoction. It is almost guaranteed that any student who attempts to recreate it will forget at the very least one step.”
“Did anyone else choose that potion?” Tom wondered.
Slughorn nodded with a twinkle in his eye.
“And did anyone get it right?” Tom asked. He was doubtful that anyone in the class could have succeeded at something he failed to perfect, but it didn’t hurt to ask.
“That’s for me to know, my boy,” the teacher answered. Seeing the frustrated look on Tom’s face, he chuckled and added, “Just know that you shouldn’t judge your partners so prematurely.”
Tom spent the majority of the night ruminating on Slughorn’s words. Could it be that you were the student who had gotten the perfect score on the potion he had attempted? He refused to believe it. Slughorn must have been referring to another student, one that Tom was paired with in the past. You couldn’t possibly be the partner in question.
~
It had been weeks since Tom came in second for the first time in his life. He convinced himself that it couldn’t have been you who bested him. Of course, he speculated who the true victor could be, but he couldn’t put his finger on who in the class could be worthy of such high marks.
Eventually, the time came for the annual examination preparation. Professor Slughorn’s students were assigned a series of practice exams to help them prepare for the actual ones. Each practice test focused on a different area within potions, and it was the students’ job to be well-versed in all of them.
At the beginning of every week, a new practice exam was passed out, and the grades for the previous week’s exam was posted on a roster at the front of the class.
Tom never bothered with making a show of checking his grades, knowing fully well that he would always be at the head of the class. But with the newfound knowledge of a possible competitor, he couldn’t quell his curiosity.
Making his way to the front of the room with the usual throng of Slytherin boys, he displayed no sign of concern. Why should the best in the year have to worry about some halfwit who ran into a bit of luck one time?
His air of indifference was quickly squashed, however, when he approached the posted practice exam scores and saw that his was the second highest. Second? That couldn’t be right. Tom Riddle never came in second. Who was first? Who could feasibly best Tom Riddle at a potions examination? The most brilliant student in all of Hogwarts, and in his best subject too?
He was horrified beyond comparison when he saw none other than your name at the pinnacle of the score sheet.
You.
Impossible. There was no chance that the bubbly girl with the face of an angel, er, a moron, could ever have received such excellent marks.
He’d seen you around, and you were most definitely not the kind of girl who cared about your performance in school. You were always smiling with your friends or tucking your hair behind your ear or dazzling a crowd with an extraordinary story. When you weren’t smoothing down your clothes or checking your made-up face, you were befriending the professors, something only stupid people needed to do.
So how could you have gotten a higher score than him? There must have been a mistake. He would have to ask Slughorn about it after class.
As he walked back to his seat, he glanced at where you were positioned, a table not too far from his own. You had already started on your assignment for the day, making quick work of the cutting and crushing of ingredients. Sure enough, you were dripping with the grace and beauty of someone who most likely didn’t know the difference between reed and foxtail.
How could one possibly be proficient in any academic subject when they looked like that? You probably spent more time shining your shoes than studying for exams. Then how did you beat him, and twice?
He watched you work for the remainder of the period. To his surprise, you were doing everything correctly. You never added a drop too much or a sprig too little. You stirred with precision and knew what color to look for in the brew. You seemed to know exactly what you were doing. Were you truly more intelligent than he had originally presumed?
Still unconvinced, he approached Professor Slughorn after dismissal to question the scores from the most recent exam.
Slughorn only sent him a mysterious look before answering, “Everything is as it should.”
-
After the third week of coming in second place, Tom decided that it was enough. It was time he put his troubles to rest and find out for himself what sort of witchcraft was in play.
“Are you cheating?” he abruptly asked you the moment you took your seat. Professor Slughorn was not yet in class, giving the students ample time to converse before lessons began.
Startled, you stared back at him. “What?”
“You must be receiving help on your practice exams or at the very least borrowing notes from someone,” he stated matter-of-factly. “So tell me. Who is it?”
You had had enough of this arrogant git’s behavior. “What makes you think I need help? Is it so hard to believe that you are not the only person in this room who can do well in school?”
“Well I- you see, you’re not exactly the sort to put much thought to academics,” he defended.
“And what sort is that?” you questioned.
“You know, the vain, pretty lot,” he said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. “I’d imagine you spend more time on your appearance than on your academics.”
You gaped at the boy before you. “You think I’m pretty? And before you go on, my appearance has nothing to do with my drive to excel in scholarly affairs. I’ll have you know I’m more than capable of receiving just as good of marks as you are, despite what you think.”
“Then work with me on today’s partner project,” he challenged.
“Excuse me?” The last thing you were expecting was for the high-and-mighty Tom Riddle to want anything to do with you after his blatant rudeness.
“If you’re truly as good as you say—”
“You mean as good as the scores prove,” you cut in.
Tom rolled his eyes. “If you’re really that good, show me. Demonstrate your skills on today’s potion, and I’ll believe you.”
So the two of you spent the class working together on the assigned potion. Tom made sure to stand back so that you could have the freedom to do things on your own, silently hoping that you would make a mistake. But you didn’t.
Your potion was perfect. There was not an herb out of place or a drop not potent enough. Everything was as it should.
You had clearly proven to Tom that you were a skilled student, worthy of his second glance. You only hoped that the self-righteous twat would realize not to judge people before knowing them.
“While I hate to admit my own shortcomings, you were right,” Tom conceded.
You smiled at his admittance. “Thanks, Tom. I’m glad you learned something from this experience.”
He had expected to feel more disdain at the fact that he had finally found his match. He was waiting for annoyance, jealousy, some spark of rage at being second-best. But all he felt was a strange sensation.
You were quite honestly brilliant, and he couldn’t remember a time when he genuinely thought that about a fellow student. You were quick-witted, sharp-tongued, and unafraid to back down from a challenge. You stood up to him despite barely knowing anything about him, other than that he was a royal pain to you. And, not to mention, you were quite a sight to behold.
It was no secret that Tom kept to himself more often than not. Sure, he had a group of peers who respected him — whether out of fear or genuine liking is up for debate — but he never got to know anyone on a personal level. He never let anyone get too close or see him for someone other than the shining pupil with big plans. But, for once, he wanted someone to share his genius with.
He intended to make you that person.
Part 2
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outercrasis · 4 years ago
Text
Maybe It’s A Sign
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Pairing: Modern!Din Djarin x F!Reader
Rating: Explicit 18+
Word Count: 9.3k+
Warnings: alcohol, implied age difference, oral sex (f receiving), vaginal fingering, p-in-v sex, unprotected sex, cockwarming
Summary:  You and Mando have been driving across America together for months. You're happy to be with him but part of you longs for something more.
A/N: I don’t really know the time period for this, probably like anything pre-2010s. There’s no use of y/n and let me know if I missed a warning :)
Read it on AO3
The breeze from the open truck window is cool against your heated skin. It's your only relief as the sun beats down on you through the windshield, the busted A/C offering no help. You're headed down some freeway in the middle of nowhere America, riding shotgun in an old beat-up truck that's seen better days.
You've been keeping your eyes on the flat landscape surrounding you, watching as field after field passes you by. They really weren't joking when they'd named them the Great Plains. Music filters through the air, some classic rock song you've heard a thousand times before. You still hum along mindlessly, enjoying the small amount of entertainment.
Bored of the vast sameness outside your window, your eyes drift over to your companion, driver, and owner of the truck. Mando. You study him, finding him far more interesting than the fields outside.
His worn baseball cap has been pushed up, presumably from scratching his scalp underneath and not bothering to fix it. Soft brown curls peek out around the edges of the hat. He has his sunglasses on and his eyes are firmly fixed on the road ahead, as they should be. The patchy scruff along his jawline has grown out a bit from your recent days on the road and you can see a few gray hairs mixed in with his darker natural color.
He shrugged off his jacket earlier in the day, leaving him in a worn gray t-shirt that hugged his lean muscles all just right. His faded blue jeans are on and you wonder how he can stand to wear them in the oppressive summer heat. You gave into shorts days ago.
All in all, he was a far better sight than anything outside the truck. As you look him over, you muse how everything he owns seems to be worn in. His rusty truck, his old hat, his distressed clothes. They all carry a sense of being lived in, nothing new and shiny on him. Well, except for his jewelry. His silver necklace and rings always shine brightly, a dramatic contrast to the rest of him.
"Stop staring," Mando suddenly says, breaking you from your observation of him. You're a little embarrassed to have been caught, but you aren't going to let him know that.
"Why? Nothin' else to look at around here."
That rewards you with a chuckle. At least he isn't irritated by your staring then.
"Don't you have a book or something?" 
You look over at the book you had thrown on the dashboard. A used copy of Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger that you picked up a couple states back. You aren't sure you like Holden, but it's a good read at least. "Yeah, but I can't read it for long before I start feeling sick. So I guess I'll just have to look at you instead."
"Sure that I won't make you sick?" Mando teases.
You smile. He's in a good mood today. There are days where conversation with him is like pulling teeth, but it makes days like today all the more worth it. 
"Nah, you aren't so hard on the eyes." You say it cool and casual, genuine but not needy. As though you don't often think of his looks when you have the time and privacy to satisfy your needs.
Mando shakes his head slightly but you can see the ghost of a smile on his lips. "Sure, sweetheart."
He never seems to believe you when you compliment his appearance. It breaks your heart a little. Sure, he has some years on you, but you aren't blind. You know a good-looking man when you see one and Mando? He was it. If the man wasn't oblivious, he'd notice the looks plenty of women and some men throw him when he strolls into town.
Not sure of what to say next, but not wanting the conversation to end, you take to a habit that's been slowly forming over your months with him. It had begun out of boredom one day, but continued due to a desperate urge to learn anything and everything your mysterious companion will tell you about himself.
"When's your birthday?"
Mando isn't surprised anymore by your random questions. "May eighteenth."
Your eyes go wide at his answer. It was July now, meaning he'd let the day come and go without telling you. You had just assumed his birthday hadn't come around with you yet. "Mando! Why didn't you tell me? I would have at least said something if I had known."
He shrugs. "Birthdays aren't a big deal where I grew up."
"Were you raised Jehovah's Witness or something?" you ask.
"No, nothing like that." His fingers drum slightly on the steering wheel. You noticed a while ago that he did that when you got close to something he didn't want to talk about. His childhood always seems to be a touchy subject.
You want to know more, want to learn all of his secrets, but you don't want to jeopardize his good mood. Mando had shared bits and pieces of those more intimate details with you over your shared months with him, but always on his own time. His own terms. You won't push it now. Instead, you pivot to something more innocuous.
"If you could only eat one meal for the rest of your life, what would it be?" 
You're surprised when he barely takes any time to consider the question before answering. "Tacos."
You raise an eyebrow. "Tacos? I took you for more of a burger and fries kind of guy."
"Nothing compares to a good authentic taco from down by the border." He says it with such confidence that you can do nothing other than believe him.
"I wouldn't know," you say.
Mando cocks an eyebrow at you now. "We'll have to fix that then."
A warm flush runs through your body at his words. You know he isn't looking to get rid of you, but hearing him make plans for the future with you, no matter how tentative, makes you happier than you care to admit. Small promises that you know he'll make good on eventually given the time and opportunity.
"What about you?" he asks.
"Easy. A full breakfast. Eggs, bacon, potatoes, and toast. Doesn't matter how they're cooked or the specific options, you can't go wrong."
You stretch yourself out in the cab as you answer, throwing your feet up on the dash. Your eyes close for a moment and you miss the way Mando's eyes rake over your extended frame.
"You're never awake for breakfast," Mando comments. He's right. You enjoy your sleep and when left to your own devices you easily dream through breakfast hours.
"That doesn't matter," you retort. "Breakfast food isn't only good in the morning."
You continue that way for a while, gathering small bits of information about him and sharing your own in return. You learn that he prefers hot weather over the cold, soft pillows over firm ones, showers over baths, and most surprisingly that he has a soft spot for musicals. That fact had made you giggle, imagining Mando singing along to The Music of the Night. With all of his mystery, he wouldn't make for a bad Phantom you think.
As the afternoon wears on, you can feel yourself growing tired. Between the warmth of the sun, the lulling rumble of the truck, and the comfortable environment of the cab, you're fighting to keep your eyes open. Mando notices your struggle and reaches a hand out towards you.
You aren't really sure when this began, but you aren't complaining about it. Mando would hold your hand whenever you fell asleep in the truck, thumb gently rubbing against your skin. His hands were rough, callused from years of work, but they felt nice. They felt strong, comforting. In those moments nothing else in the world mattered. And if you thought about his hands later, touching places other than your hands, then that was your business and no one else’s. 
You wake up a couple hours later, Mando calling your name to pull you from your sleep. The sun has moved down in the sky and you guess it’s somewhere close to five o’clock. You’d check the time on the radio, but Mando never seemed to bother keeping it right due to regularly changing time zones with all the cross country traveling. 
You’re sitting outside of some 24 hour diner on a random roadside. Mando seems to be fond of these little dives, preferring them to any of the big chain restaurants you always pass. Fast food is the only exception to that rule and even that’s rare, these food stops often being one of few chances to stretch your legs when you’re on the road.
“What do you think? Do they have the best pie in America?” you joke, pointing at the sun-worn sign hanging below the restaurant’s name. You can’t count how many ‘best blank in America’ signs you’ve seen at this point. While you can’t credit their authenticity, it usually did mean there was something good waiting for you on the menu.
“I suppose we’ll have to be the judges of that,” Mando replies.
You tug on your socks and shoes that you pulled off earlier in the day and hop out of the truck. The easy conversation and warm nap have you in a great mood, one that makes you a little bolder than you might otherwise be. Walking into the diner, you grab onto Mando’s arm, smiling at him when he looks down at you in surprise. He doesn’t pull away from you though and your heart beats a little bit faster.
The diner has plenty of open seats and you seat yourselves, grabbing one of the booths. The stiff vinyl isn’t the most comfortable, but you can’t say you’re surprised. The place looks like it hasn’t been renovated in a decade. If the smell from the kitchen is anything to go off of though, the food will be just fine.
A waitress comes over to take your orders. She’s exactly what you would imagine a waitress to look like in a diner like this one. Slightly heavyset, a kind face, and a big smile to offer you. “Hi there, what can I get the two of you?” she asks.
“I’ll take a coke, ma’am,” Mando says. He seems oblivious to the flush on the waitress’s cheeks at his baritone. 
“I’ll take a coke too.”
“I’ll be right back, folks.”
You reach over to grab a sticky menu from the end of the table. The stickiness grosses you out a little, but it really does add to the ambiance of the place. Your conversation from earlier drifting back into mind, you immediately look for the breakfast section. Perfect. Their ‘two eggs and more’ option is exactly what you were looking for.
The waitress returns with your drinks and takes your orders, Mando getting himself a burger and fries. You smirk at him, taking the wrapper off of your straw. “I thought you said you weren’t a burger and fries kind of guy?”
Mando watches as you carefully make a wrapper worm, dropping the smallest amount of soda on the paper to make it move. “I just said tacos were my favorite, never said I’m a guy who doesn’t enjoy a good burger and fries, sweetheart.”
“Fair enough,” you say with a shrug.
You fall into a comfortable silence together at the table. Silence isn’t an uncommon occurrence between the two of you. When you first joined Mando you talked all the time. Trying to fill up the empty space, feeling like if someone wasn’t talking then the situation was awkward. Slowly you learned though. The silence was never awkward until you made it that way and unless Mando had something to say, he’d stay quiet. He’s not incapable of conversation, he just doesn’t like to force it.
You softly hum a tune that’s been stuck in your head, looking out the diner window and enjoying the sunset. It’s a gorgeous one today, the sky looking like an oil painting with its gradient of colors. The flat plains allow for a good view of it too, only a small building in the distance blocking any part of the horizon. You kick yourself for not picking up that disposable camera at the gas station this morning. The photo would never do it justice, but at least that way you could have a small piece of the gorgeous sky to hold onto.
Plates being set down on the table brings you back down to earth. You happily dig into your meal, pleased to have been right about the quality of food here. Nothing could beat a good meal at a greasy diner. Mando seems to enjoy his burger as well, scarfing it down well before you finish your plate.
He always ate like that and you aren’t sure why. It’s as though he thinks if he doesn’t eat it fast enough then someone is going to come and steal it from him. Early on you’d tried to speed up your eating, feeling awkward every time he finished and was forced to wait on you. Now though, you don’t care. Mando rarely ever stops moving and a meal with you is a time you can be certain that he isn’t doing anything for once. You hope that eventually it might encourage him to actually enjoy his food as well, but that still seems a long way off.
Mando picks at his fries and sips at his coke while you finish up. The waitress comes by to refill the drinks, another flush on her cheeks when Mando thanks her. There must not be many attractive men who roll through here if a simple thanks has her blushing, you think. Poor lady, she seems quite nice.
“So, what’s the plan?” you ask Mando between bites of egg and toast.
“Plan?” 
“Yes, plan. We’ve been driving west for two days now and you seem to have some destination in mind. So, what’s the plan?” What plan, of course Mando has a plan. He always does. Was it always well thought out or complete? No, but there is never a time where he doesn’t have some sort of plan, some idea of where he’s off to next. You’re the one without plans, content with travelling alongside him.
Before Mando can reply, the waitress returns to the table and clears his now empty plate. “Can we get a slice of your pie?” Mando asks.
“Of course, what flavor would you like?” she replies.
“Whatever flavor you think is best, ma’am.” That garners yet another blush on the waitress’s cheeks. Wow. Things must be really bad around here then. One good-looking customer shouldn’t have that big of an impact on anyone, much less a woman who’s clearly made this job her life’s work.
She leaves and you prompt Mando again. “So? Plan?”
“I’m going to meet someone tonight, pick up a new job. Then we’ll go from there,” he finally tells you. 
You aren’t pleased by his half-cryptic half-telling answer. He’s always doing this to you, giving you answers but never quite the whole thing. You bet he already knows what the next job is, he’s just being coy about it for some ridiculous reason.
You decide not to push it and slide your plate over to Mando. There are some hash browns left and he won’t just ask for them despite the fact that you’re clearly done. He doesn’t say thanks, just picks up the fork and shovels them in. This by now is routine too so it doesn’t bother you, but it’s still odd. Mando is just weird about food.
He finishes the last of your meal and the waitress returns with the pie. “Blueberry, winner of the county festival five years running,” she tells you.
You grab a fork and dig in, suddenly finding the room in your stomach for dessert. Best pie in America might be a stretch, but you believe their claim to the best pie in the county. It’s delicious, eliciting a small but satisfied groan from you on the first bite. You go to take a second bite when you realize Mando hasn’t moved yet, he’s just watching you with an expression on his face that you can’t quite make out.
“Earth to Mando?” you say, waving your hand. “Try the pie, it’s delicious.”
He breaks from his stare and takes a piece of the pie. “‘S good,” he says around the mouthful.
You laugh at his terrible manners. “Gross, finish chewing before you talk.”
He doesn’t have a witty retort, but he gives you a grin that makes you feel like you’ve won a million dollars. It’s one of the ones that reaches his eyes, making them just shy of sparkling. Now you really wish you had bought that disposable camera.
Finishing the award-winning dessert, you and Mando go up to the counter to pay. He’s left a tip on the table, a sizable one in your opinion, but you aren’t going to say anything about it. Mando is always leaving big tips at places like these.
You take in the diner for one last moment, not paying attention to Mando’s conversation with the waitress until she says something that catches your ear.
“-shift ends in a half hour.” Did you hear that right? Was she really propositioning Mando right now? Christ, things must be downright desolate around here. 
Your heart stops as you wait to hear Mando’s reply. He could easily accept. She’s an attractive woman with that classic middle America charm about her. Any other man would probably take her up on the offer. Would it shatter your heart into a million pieces if Mando did? Most likely. But do you have any right to feel that way? Most likely not. 
Mando isn’t tied to you, at least not in that way, and he’s certainly still a man. You haven’t known him to chase after any women the whole time you’ve been with him, but surely he has needs and the waitress is beautiful and willing. You wouldn’t be able to fault him for it. 
“I’m flattered, but the lady here and I need to be getting back on the road,” Mando says, slinging an arm around your shoulders. You do your best to keep your face neutral, not wanting to come off as rude while also trying not to make it obvious the way your heart swoops at Mando’s reply. You know he doesn’t mean anything serious by it, but the implication is still very much there.
Embarrassment washes over the poor woman’s face. “Oh, I’m so sorry, I just assumed…” she trails off, not finishing her thought. You want to feel bad for her, but you can’t help but feel sorry for yourself.
You have a good idea of what she assumed. You’ve heard a multitude of mistaken relationships by now between you and Mando. Everything from some kind of family relation, to something more perverted that’s assumed by greasy motel attendants who cast odd glances when you ask for a double instead of a single. It’s never any less uncomfortable.
 Mando brushes it off. “It’s fine ma’am, no harm, no foul.” The waitress doesn’t blush at his words anymore.
Bill paid, you and Mando leave the diner. His arm leaves you and you climb back into the truck. The radio flickers back to life and neither of you speak. You wish you could know what’s going on inside of his head. Probably just thinking about the next job. That seems like him, always focused on what’s coming next.
You can’t help but be consumed with thoughts of him. Situations like the one with the waitress always left you distracted. There’s no real way to describe your relationship with Mando. You had helped him with a deal and he had helped you with a way out of your one-horse town. Originally neither of you planned on staying together for this long, but at some point Mando stopped asking you where you wanted to go and you stopped asking if he was going to leave.
You’re comfortable around each other, content to drive across America while Mando picks up job after job. At some point your feelings deepened for him, you aren’t exactly sure when, but now you can’t imagine leaving Mando. It’s no longer just about the adventure of it for you. It’s something more, a deeper tie than you’ve ever had to anyone. However, you have no idea if he feels the same way and you don’t intend to find out. Better to love your mystery man from afar then reveal yourself and get left in the dust.
Fifteen minutes into the drive, Mando reaches over and turns down the radio. “I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable back there.”
You’re a bit surprised to hear an apology. After all, he had nothing to really apologize for. The waitress had come onto him, not the other way around. You know Mando isn’t the type to flat out refuse and insult someone like that. What he had done was… fine. You had hardly even considered it.
“You didn’t make me uncomfortable, Mando,” you tell him. “If anything she did, propositioning you like that.”
A small, relieved smile works its way across his face. “It was quite bold.” 
That makes you laugh. “I’m not surprised, she was sizing you up since we walked in.”
“She was not,” Mando argues.
You shift in your seat to face him. “Are you kidding? You really didn’t notice her blushing every time you spoke to her?” If Mando was this oblivious maybe you didn’t need to worry about him catching onto you.
“Now you’re just lying, sweetheart.”
“Am not. You just don’t pay attention.”
Mando rolls his eyes and turns the radio back up. He mumbles something but you can’t make it out. You let it slide and allow yourself to relax. Your hand falls to the center of the bench seat as you look out the window. The stars are coming out now, another gorgeous sight in the vast expanse of the sky. So far away from the city, it feels like you can see every pinprick of light the universe has to offer. It’s a bit disorienting honestly. Nothing makes you feel smaller by comparison and yet, you don’t really mind.
You startle as something wraps around your hand. Looking down, you realize that it’s just Mando, holding your hand as he does when you’re close to falling asleep in the truck. You look up at him, confused. You aren’t anywhere close to nodding off. He should know that, so why…? 
Mando doesn’t look at you, keeping his eyes fixed on the road. His thumb softly rubs against the back of your hand. You relax into his touch, turning your eyes back to the stars. Confusion about Mando’s actions doesn’t compare to the way your stomach flips at his gentle touch. It feels nice, domestic almost, if one can consider a life lived out of the front seat of a rusted out pickup domestic. His hand doesn’t leave yours until he pulls into the pothole filled parking lot of some dive bar.
Mando parks and turns the truck off. You move to get out of the truck with him when he squeezes your hand to stop you.
“Stay in the truck,” Mando says. His hand leaves you and he opens his own door, jumping out onto the cracked asphalt. 
You look over at him, incredulous. “Excuse me? You know I am old enough to go in there, right?”
“I know. Stay in the truck.” Mando closes the truck door, giving you no more room to argue with him. It pisses you off. 
What is this? Soften you up by holding your hand only to leave you behind? You hate when he does this, treating you like a child that’s just tagging along with him. You suppose you are tagging along, which stings a bit more, but you could be helpful, useful even if he would just let you in. Instead he keeps you at arm’s length at times, treating you like you can’t take care of yourself. He has no right to boss you around like that, telling you where you can and can’t go.
You watch his figure enter the bar, temper rising. If this place was good enough for him, it was certainly good enough for you. A bar like this had been where you met Mando months ago, working as a bartender and server. It didn’t bring back the best of memories, but you can handle yourself. At worst a fight might break out or patrons might get a little handsy. You can avoid the first and as for the second, it’s not as though Mando would need to put someone in the hospital for getting a little too flirty with you.
After fuming in the truck for a couple minutes, you make up your mind. You look yourself over in the mirror, trying to fix your appearance to look like you hadn't just spent the last two days in a truck. Pleased with yourself, you pull your shirt down slightly to reveal a bit more cleavage. The discovery of the power a pair of tits held in dive bars was one you made a long time ago. You flip the mirror back up and get out of the truck.
You practice your walk as you approach the bar door, trying to keep it calm and confident. Mando is going to be pissed at you for this, you already know, but you refuse to be treated like a child. If coming in here without his permission is what it takes for him to view you differently, then so be it. Younger you might be, but incapable you are not.
The moment you walk in the door, you spot Mando. He’s in the corner, talking to someone with his back to the door. He doesn’t even notice as you walk in and stroll up to the bar.
The man behind the counter is old, his white shirt spotted with stains and a towel thrown over his shoulder. It’s almost too stereotypical a look and you want to laugh. The stiff look he gives you though stifles your amusement.
“What can I get you?” he asks gruffly as you take a seat at the bartop.
“I’ll take a whiskey on the rocks.” 
Whiskey is not your favorite drink. Not by a long shot. Really, you would have loved to order something fruity that you can’t taste the alcohol in, but whiskey is something you’ve learned to tolerate. You know that appearances matter in a place like this and a fruity drink would mark you as someone lost, not as someone who belongs here. You aren’t looking to get trashed anyway, just something to calm your nerves.
It doesn’t take long before someone is sidling up next to you at the bar. You don’t acknowledge him right away, instead staring up at the small CRT TV that’s playing the local news above the bar. Some murder case from a couple towns over is currently being highlighted. Lovely.
“What’s a pretty thing like you doing here?” he asks you.
You glance over at him, enough to get a look, but you don’t let your eyes linger. Lingering eyes would mean an invitation that you certainly don’t want to give. You have to admit, as far as seedy dive bar men went, he isn’t hard to look at. Not much older than you, clean shaven, bright blue eyes. Another time you might have gone for someone like him. Not now. These days your thoughts are only occupied by scruff, dark hair, and warm brown eyes.
“Came in for a drink,” you reply simply.
He leans in a bit closer. “Can I buy you another?”
You take a sip of your drink. “I think I’m alright, thanks.”
He pushes in even further, placing a hand on your thigh. This guy didn’t take no for an answer apparently. “Aw, come on now, don’t be that way sweetheart.”
Hearing him call you sweetheart makes you want to punch him more than him touching you does. It sounds wrong coming out of his mouth, harsh and manipulative, not the smooth and warm way Mando says it. For a moment, you do seriously consider punching this guy square in the jaw before deciding against it. You came in here to prove a point and not being able to handle a pushy guy would just prove the exact opposite of that.
You turn in your chair to move your thigh away from him. He has the decency to let his hand fall at least. “Don’t call me that,” you tell him.
“Alright then, what do I call you?”
You turn your attention back to the TV. Now they were highlighting a feel good story about an animal adoption from the nearby shelter. Odd shift in tone. You don’t reply to Blue-eyes and hope he gets the message. 
“Playing hard to get, that’s fine,” he says. You take another sip of your whiskey. The news shifts to the weather. There’s more warm weather on the way for the next week, no storms in sight. That’ll be nice to drive in you think.
Blue-eyes’ hand returns to your thigh, creeping up higher than it was before. “I don’t mind hard to get, sweetheart.”
That one garners a slap. You do it before you even give it a real thought. It’s a good one at least, making a very solid sound as his head spins. It’s a testament to the bar that no one even spares it a second glance. Blue-eyes turns back to you, furious.
“You’re going to regret that, bitch,” he hisses at you, roughly grabbing your arm.
“You’re going to regret it if you don’t take your hand off of her.” 
You’ve never been so happy to hear Mando’s voice in your life. Could you handle this guy? Probably. Do you want to? Absolutely not. You know on your own there's a near certain chance you'll end up with bruises before this guy gives up.
Somewhere in your mind you register the very real possibility that Mando is pissed at you right now. You shove it down, choosing to focus on the fact that he did just come to your defense. 
Blue-eyes is more stupid then he looks and doesn’t read the very obvious threat Mando poses. Instead he doubles down and tightens his grip on you. “Oh yeah? And what are you going to do about it, old man?”
You can't say you're surprised when Mando punches him in the face instead of answering the question. You also can’t say that you feel bad about it either. The surprise and hurt of the sudden punch makes Blue-eyes release his grip on you, giving you enough time to move out of the way as Mando moves in. Mando grabs a fistful of Blue-eyes' shirt and pulls the guy in towards his face. 
“Do you regret it?” Mando grits out. Blue-eyes sputters something that sounds like an apology and pushes himself away. 
Satisfied, Mando now turns on you. You were right, he's pissed. His typically soft, warm eyes are hard on you now as he pulls you away.
You flounder to tell him you haven't paid for your drink but he just ignores you, dragging you out of the bar. If you were smarter, you would think to be a little scared about making a man like Mando mad at you. Instead, your thoughts are occupied with how he's barely even trying to overpower you and yet you couldn't break free of his grip if you tried. You wonder if there's something wrong with you for how much it's turning you on.
Arriving back at the truck, Mando releases his grip. "Get in," he demands.
You do as you're told and climb into the passenger seat as Mando goes around. Nerves finally settle in. Mando would never hurt you, you know that, but he could decide to ditch you somewhere. Whatever this situation is with him, it's far from formal. He has no obligation to you and could easily choose to end it. With the trouble you’ve just caused, you wouldn’t be surprised if this all comes to a swift and sudden end.
As Mando climbs into the cab, you stare down at the floorboards, terrified that he's going to tell you he's dropping you off somewhere and leaving you behind for good. You can't imagine your life without him now. There's nowhere for you to go, nothing for you to do without him. Right back to square one.
He doesn't speak right away, which only makes you more nervous. He peels the truck out of the parking lot, headed back in the direction you came from. You still don't look at him. It's obvious you fucked up and there's nothing you can really say to fix that. Your only hope is that he forgives you.
You're headed back through the small nearby town when he finally speaks. “I told you to stay in the truck.”
You don’t say anything in response. Anything you can come up with sounds childish in your head. The exact opposite of what you'd been trying to prove. Thankfully, Mando takes your silence as an answer.
“Why would you even do something like that? Do you know how stupid that was?” His hands are tight on the wheel, glancing between you and the road as he yells.
You mumble back to him. 
“What was that? I couldn’t hear you.”
“He called me sweetheart,” you say a little louder.
“What?” He isn't going to let you off the hook with this and it gets under your skin. Some part of you thought he might be proud of you for smacking that creep and here he is berating you for it.
“He called me sweetheart, alright?” you half-shout.
Mando gives you a confused look, clearly not the answer he was expecting. “Do you- do you have a problem with that?” The heat is still present in his voice, but you can hear a little worry in it now. Shit. This is not what you wanted out of this whole ordeal.
You've never wanted the ground to come up and swallow you more. Why didn’t you just say that you smacked him for touching you? That would have been simple. How do you answer this without making everything weird? No, Mando, I don’t have a problem with that. I smacked him because I only like it when you call me that. Sure. That won’t be weird or awkward at all. 
After cursing yourself for a few seconds, you manage a response. “No, I- I just didn’t like it when he said it.”
"Oh." That's Mando's only reply.
You know he's still angry about you coming into the bar, but apparently your answer has sidelined him. If it wasn't so embarrassing, you might even be rejoicing at his reaction. Instead you just feel like a fool.
The silence remains as you pull into a little local motel with the vacancy sign lit up. Mando hands you forty dollars, way more than you need, and tells you to get a room.
Okay. So he isn't getting rid of you… yet.
You barely even listen to the attendant as they tell you they only have one single available for the night. Now is not the time to be arguing about sleeping arrangements. You take the key, room 104, and make your way back to the truck. 
You grab your bag from the flatbed and let Mando know the room number. He nods and goes to pull the truck around. You kick yourself as you walk over to the room. Why didn’t you just stay in the truck? Why didn’t you just lie to Mando about your reasons? He’s smart and it won’t take long now for him to put two and two together. Especially if he asks anymore questions.
You have no idea how Mando might react. If learning about your feelings towards him combined with what happened in the bar might be enough to leave you. He’s certainly not cold with you, but you’re not sure you’d call any of his actions romantic either. Holding your hand after the diner today is the closest he’s ever come. You wish you knew what that meant to him. You know what it meant to you.
Mando parks the truck outside of the room as you unlock the door. It’s not a fancy room, just one big square with a bathroom attached. There’s a full bed, a dresser with a TV on it, and a small table with a couple chairs. You toss your bag on the table and sit down on the edge of the bed. There’s no point in pretending you aren’t upset, Mando can always see through your lies. Might as well just get this over with.
Nervous, you hide your face in your hands, leaning forward with your elbows on your knees. You’re ready to deal with it, but not while actually looking at him. You can’t handle seeing his face as he figures things out; the way he might look at you while he rejects you. Suddenly you feel a wave of sympathy for the waitress earlier today. You hope Mando will let you down easy like he did for her.
You don’t look up when Mando comes into the room. His boots enter your line of vision and you close your eyes. You can’t look at any part of him right now. It’s too painful.
Mando says your name softly and you can sense as he kneels down in front of you. You don’t reply. Gently, he moves your hands away from your face. You still refuse to look at him and he cups your chin, lifting your head up to his.
“Look at me, sweetheart.” You wish you could resist, but you can’t. Not when he speaks to you in that soft tone. Not when he calls you that.
You meet his eye and see all the concern and worry he holds there. “I’m sorry, Mando. I should have listened to you.”
His hand slides up to hold your cheek. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have treated you that way. I could have at least told you why I didn’t want you coming in with me.”
You’re surprised at his apology. Two apologies he didn’t need to make in one day. This isn’t something you ever expected. You assumed he would still be full of heat and anger, not this careful kindness.
“Why didn’t you want me to come in?” you ask. You need to know the reason, need to know why it is he told you to stay behind. No matter how much the reason might hurt.
Mando sighs. “I didn’t want you to come in because I didn’t want anyone else looking at you.”
You pull back out of shock. “What?” Did you hear that correctly? Could that mean what you thought it might?
He takes off his baseball cap and runs a hand through his hair. “What can I say, sweetheart? I’m a jealous man.”
A thousand thoughts run through your mind. There are so many things you want to say, so many questions you want to ask, and yet none of them can find their way out. As a result, you do the only thing you can.
You lean in towards him, slowly, giving him enough time to stop you if he so chooses. He doesn’t though, instead following your lead and moving in closer. You carefully search his eyes for any answers they may hold. Your noses bump and you both pause. “Mando, I-”
He cuts you off. “Din. My name is Din.”
You close the gap and kiss him. The kiss is careful at first, as though you’re both still looking to confirm that yes, this is what you both want. Mand- Din’s lips are soft and sweet against yours and you melt as it’s everything you could have imagined and more. A small moan escapes you, one that you’re embarrassed about until it causes Din to deepen the kiss. Caution evaporates, quickly turning into passion as your tongues meet.
Din moves, getting up from the floor and pushing you back against the bed. His lips never leave yours, devouring you as though you might slip away at any moment. He gives your bottom lip a small nip, quickly soothing it with his tongue. You pull away, needing a moment to catch your breath.
“Is this okay?” Din asks, his voice low with desire. You respond by pulling him back down into another bruising kiss. Your positions shift as the kiss continues, Din’s knee finding its way between your legs as his arms wrap around you. Both of your hands have worked their way into his hair, something you’ve been fantasizing about for months now.
Din begins to kiss his way down your neck, leaving little love bites along the way. You gently tug on his hair, pulling a heavenly sound from him that only intensifies your pool of desire. Desperate for more, you move a hand down, seeking the hem of his shirt and slipping your hand underneath. His skin feels remarkable under your fingertips.
Din pulls away from your neck and quickly divests himself of his shirt. He allows you a moment to take him in, his lean physique flexing as he holds himself above you. Scars litter his body in various shapes and sizes, but you think they look beautiful against the glow of his honeyed skin. 
Taking the opportunity, you remove your top as well, leaving you in your basic everyday bra. You wish you had worn your other bra, the sexier one, but with the way Din is looking at you, you’re not sure it matters. His lips return to your body, working his way across any and all of your newly exposed skin. One hand splays on your waist, holding you, grounding Din against you.
“You’re so soft, sweetheart,” Din murmurs against you. His lips find their way up to your chest, placing careful kisses against the globes of your breasts. He pauses and looks up at you, seeking your permission. You arch your back, allowing Din access to slip a hand beneath you and undo the clasp.
He pulls the bra away from you and you flush under the intensity of his gaze. “Perfect, you’re perfect,” Din says before reoccupying his mouth with your breasts. It seems that he has a real oral fixation, not that you mind in the slightest. His warm mouth feels heavenly against you, licking and sucking wherever he can.
Din takes one of your nipples into his mouth, his fingers playing with the other. It’s the best thing you’ve felt in months, better than any of your late night fantasies when you would try to satisfy your growing want for the man currently giving you so much pleasure. As though your attempts could ever come close to the real thing.
Din releases your nipple with a pop and returns to your mouth, licking his way inside. His kiss alone is enough to make you see stars. It makes you forget any other kiss you’ve ever shared, enveloping you in him and him alone.
You pull back slightly from the kiss, unable to take more without further relief. “Din, please, I want you,” you pant into his mouth. Din growls, actually growls, at your words. It's a far hotter response than it should be.
“Yeah, sweetheart? What do you want me to do to you? Tell me.” His knee comes up and presses his thigh against you where you want him most, causing you to moan out his name. “Use your words, sweet girl.”
He’s trying to kill you, you think. Calling you a name like that. Sweet girl. It loops in your mind until Din’s fingers ghost over your nipples again. “I want you to touch me,” you tell him.
“I’m already touching you,” Din says. He’s a tease, you think, growing slightly frustrated with him. His thigh moves against you again though and he’s immediately forgiven.
“Please, Din,” you whine, hoping he’ll take pity on you. Thankfully he does, moving his leg away and quickly removing your pants. You already know you’re soaking, your panties feeling cold against you with the loss of the other cloth barrier.
Din pauses for another moment to take you in before moving. You’re nearly bare before him, almost entirely on display. 
“You’re so beautiful,” he compliments, his hands parting your thighs. “So perfect, so beautiful, and all mine.” You can feel yourself clench at his words. No one has ever made you feel this way before. His stare only relaxes you more, his words feeling like a warm blanket wrapping around your fears and quieting them.
Din’s fingers brush against you through the thin cotton. “Is this all for me, sweetheart? I can already feel how wet you are.”
He continues to tease you, only leaving you capable of nodding your head back at him. His eyes catch yours, watching your reaction as he pushes the near useless fabric off to the side and pushes one finger between your folds. Just the small touch sets you aflame, pushing yourself down onto his hand, wanting more. 
His finger leaves you and you frown until you watch as he brings it to his mouth and licks your slick off of it. Din moans at the taste. “You taste better than you do in my dreams.”
He leans down to kiss you, sharing the taste of yourself while he pulls your panties off completely. They’re thrown haphazardly into the room, lost to be found for later. 
Din then moves himself between your legs, slowly working kisses down your body as he slides back onto his knees on the floor. He grabs your waist and pulls you to the edge of the bed with ease and starts nipping and kissing your inner thighs. Your hands wind back into his hair, while you lie in disbelief that this is really happening right now.
Gentle kisses are placed along your folds, Din moving back as you try to grind your hips down onto him. His eyes catch yours again, mouth hovering over your clit as he speaks. “I’m going to taste you until you cum on my face and then I’m going to fuck you, okay?”
This time you manage a response, frantic to let him know that’s exactly what you want. “Yes, please, I want you so badly, Din.”
It’s all he needs to hear. His mouth comes down on your clit, carefully playing with the bundle of nerves, making you cry out and clench around nothing. He pulls away slightly and then licks a long stripe from bottom to top, pausing again at your clit to give it a teasing suck. Your hands pull at his hair from the attention.
He moves back down, teasing your entrance with his mouth. He moans, lapping up your pussy, acting every part a man dying of thirst who’s found oasis at your core. You buck into him and his hands quickly wrap around your legs, holding your hips in place. Din wants to pleasure you, but on his own terms, at his own speed.
You can’t make a coherent thought as he continues to eat you out. Small snippets of words make their way out of you, none of them making any real sense in conjunction with one another. It’s not until his thumb finds your clit as he continues to lick, suck, and nip at you that you find complete words to shout. “Din, oh god, yes, right there, I’m so close...”
Moments later you feel the tension within you snap, crying out as your body shakes from the overwhelming pleasure. Din continues to work you through your orgasm, only stopping when you physically push his head away from you. He trails hot kisses along your inner thighs again, telling you how beautiful you are, how good you taste, how perfect your pussy is.
As you come down from your high, Din removes the last of his clothes, finally freeing his stiff erection. Your breath catches as you take him in, your Adonis in the flesh. He’s gorgeous, you think, wondering what you did to get so lucky.
Then he’s back over top of you, kissing and sucking at your skin. Some of those are bound to leave marks for tomorrow but you don’t mind. You want everyone to see, for everyone to know that you’re his. No more mistaken assumptions about your relationship, you want it on display for the world.
You look down to catch a better glimpse of his cock, satiating the curiosity that’s plagued you for so long. He’s big. More than enough to fill you, possibly even more than you can handle. As wet as you are, you know you’ll need him to go slow, to slowly stretch you out before he can truly fuck you.
You tilt your hips, bumping against him, letting him know that you want him. “Do you want my fingers first?” Din asks. You know you should say yes, but you can’t imagine another moment without knowing what he feels like inside of you.
“No,” you tell him. “Just go slow.”
Din places a quick searing kiss against your lips and positions himself. The head of his cock presses against your slick entrance and you feel like you’re already seeing stars. Din is muttering in your ear, holding you tightly against him as he pushes into you.
“Fuck, you feel so good sweetheart. So tight and wet for me. I can’t wait to fill you up, to feel every inch of your sweet pussy.”
You nearly forget to breath as he slowly pushes in further. You can feel every inch of him and you only want more. Din’s stream of compliments are interrupted when he finally bottoms out in you, holding himself still as your walls clench and stretch around him. “Fuck, sweetheart.”
You turn your head and pull him into a blazing kiss, loving the way he feels filling you up. You wonder how you were ever satisfied with your fingers before when this had been next to you for so long. Din is apparently thinking along the same lines, whispering to you, “I’d have done this long ago if I knew you felt this good.”
You don’t even have time to consider the words as he slowly begins to move in you. The pleasure borders on agonizing as you begin to move your hips, encouraging him to move faster. Din responds quickly to your urging, setting a furious pace as he begins to lose all control. You know you’ll still be feeling him tomorrow and the thought makes you smile. You never want to go another day without a reminder of how he feels.
His thumb returns to your clit and you don’t have time to warn him before you’re thrown into another orgasm. Your walls clench around him and you lose yourself in the feeling of cumming on his cock. Din quickly follows, pulling out of you just in time to paint your stomach with ropes of his spend. You mourn the loss of him, but once Din finishes he buries himself back inside of you, causing another shock of pleasure to zing through your body.
Din rolls the both of you over, keeping himself sheathed in you, and allowing you to collapse on top of him. You’re both sweaty and panting, trying to come up with words. Din’s fingers lightly trace along your back, causing goosebumps to erupt across your flesh. You lift your head up from his chest in order to look at his face.
He’s completely debauched, sweat causing hair to cling to his forehead, the rest completely wild from your hands. His eyes are still blown wide, happily looking back at you. His lips are pink and swollen from all the kisses and licks he’s pressed into your skin. You know you can’t look much better than him.
You give a small clench around him and smile at the expression that runs across Din’s face. “I love the way you fill me,” you tell him. Din presses a loving kiss against your sweaty forehead.
“I never want to leave this perfect pussy of yours.” You can tell he means it too. If he could, he would stay buried in you forever. You love the way that sounds. His eyes flutter closed, reveling in the feeling of having you surround him.
“Din,” you say.
His eyes pop back open and refocus on you. “Yeah, sweetheart?”
A smile blooms across your face. “Nothing, I just wanted to say it. Din. It suits you.” 
His name suits him in a different way than Mando does. Mando is the rough exterior, the front he puts up to the world. The one who punches men in bars for touching you and calling you pet names. The one that strikes fear into others, knowing that if he’s hot on their trail that they’re screwed. Din is the soft inside, the place where all of his ‘sweethearts’ originate, the cause for the hand holding and sparkling smiles. The man behind the armor that he presents to the world, the one who kisses and fills you up just right.
Din’s arms wrap around you tightly, clearly intent on never letting you go. You’re fine with that, letting it sink in that you’re finally laying in bed with the man who’s consumed your thoughts for months. A small, joyous giggle escapes you.
“What’s so funny?” Din asks.
“I thought you were going to leave me earlier. Now here I am, laying on top of you with your cock still inside of me.”
Din chuckles and you can feel it rumble in his chest. “I’m never letting you go sweetheart, no matter how much you piss me off.”
You fold your arms across his chest, letting your chin rest on your hands. “I am sorry. I just wanted you to notice me. I felt like you were treating me like a child,” you confess.
Din’s eyes widen a bit at your admission. “I always notice you, mesh’la. I never meant to treat you that way. I only want to keep you safe.”
“I know that now. Honestly, I feel so silly about it all.” He reaches up and pushes a strand of hair back from your face. 
“Next time, I’ll take you in with me. I’ll show everyone that you’re mine.” He grinds his hips up into you to prove his point. It makes you squeal, causing a smirk to settle on Din’s lips. You give his cheek a small flick in retaliation but make no attempt to move.
You lay there for a little while longer, laying your head back down against Din’s chest, listening to his steady heartbeat beneath you. His hands trace anywhere he can touch on you, intoxicated by having you so close against him. Eventually though, you feel the call to use the bathroom and can no longer ignore it.
Din is almost painful sliding out of you, but you’re more upset about the loss of having him buried in you. Your legs are shaky as you stand, managing to make it to the bathroom on wobbly knees. You take a moment to clean yourself up, running a damp cloth across your body. Exhaustion hits as you return to bed, crawling under the covers and into Din’s arms.
You begin to drift off when Din asks, “Why’d you get a single? Not that I’m complaining.”
“All they had left. Maybe it was a sign,” you mumble back.
Din chuckles and presses a kiss against your head. “Yeah, maybe, sweetheart.”
649 notes · View notes
thebiggestfan1 · 3 years ago
Text
Are you in town? - Matthew Tkachuk (part 1)
part two here
part three here
word count: 1860 words
TW: language, angst (?)
let me know if you want part two, I’m somehow still not sure
...
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It was so hot that day. The movers were already gone, the place feeling empty without all the furniture. In a few hours, you'd be long gone, flying far away from Chesterfield.
Some small part of you felt sorry for selling your parents' house - the house you spent your whole childhood living in. But they moved out a few years ago and told you many times they didn't mind at all selling it.
Wiping the sweat off of your eyebrows you made your way through the blooming garden, trying to memorize every little detail. You remembered climbing this tree, you remembered the hole in the fence you made so the neighbour's dog could come play with you, you remembered the time capsule you and Matt buried here when you were fifteen.
Until now, you completely forgot about that. Even though you two didn't talk after he got drafted, it'd be a good idea to meet again since you might never see him again. You might be moving to Calgary but that city was so big it'd be a miracle to meet Matthew somewhere.
So you scrolled through your phone, praying he didn't change his number after all those years as you dialed it.
The phone rang twice before someone picked it up.
"Yes?"
Matthew's voice was so different since the last time you talked.
"Hey Matt, this is Y/N, I'm moving out today and I thought we could dig up the time capsule we buried at my place as kids before I leave. Are you in town?" It was off-season so you might get lucky.
"You are moving out already? But yeah, I can meet you in an hour if you have the time."
"Yes, I'll still be here, don't worry."
"Okay..." There was a moment of awkward silence, neither of you knew how to break it. Was it a bad idea? Of course you wouldn't be as good friends as you once were. But you didn't know it would be this... weird. He didn't say goodbye back when he left to Calgary and didn't answer to any of your calls or messages. What were you thinking? That he wanted to see you?
"So, where are you moving to?" Matt finally continued, making the conversation more bareable.
"Calgary, they offered me an amazing job there."
"Really? I've been there for a few years."
"I heard." Not from you, was what you didn't say. It seemed like he'd heard it nonetheless.
Silence. You hated how distant you've grown - once, a long time ago, you were best friends. You went together to kindergarden and since then you've been the best of best friends. But even after all you went through, you didn't know what to say.
"Nevermind, I have to get going. I'll be at your place at three, okay?"
"Okay. I'll meet you there."
As you hung up, sadness enveloped you. Maybe you shouldn't have called. Maybe it'd be better to never meet Matt again, to remember only the good old times.
But he might be already on his way and you wanted to say a proper goodbye before going far, far away.
You loved him once, you recalled. It broke your heart when he left without looking back.
It irritated you that you couldn't do the same as easily.
...
"Y/N?" a now familiar voice called, the sound of closing car doors echoing through the silent street.
Matt looked same as he did four years ago and still totally different. It was like staring at a stranger you could swear you've already seen before. The curly, those pretty grey-blue eyes and the crooked smile you remembered and thought about too often. He got taller and more mascular over the time he played hockey professionally.
"Hey," you said nervously, tucking your slightly trembling hands into the pockets of your shorts.
Again, that uncomfortable silence took place.
"How long is it?" Since you've last seen each other. Since he'd ignored your calls and messages. Since he'd left you crying as he left this town - as he left you.
"Five years," you said.
Regret flashed in those pretty eyes as he took you in. Did you look to him the same as you did the last time he saw you?
"I'm sorry I didn't call." That was it? After five fucking years of silence, this was his apology for everything. This was a mistake. You didn't think it through when you called him today. Just now you started remembering all the things he's done to you.
"That doesn't make it hurt less, does it?" You whipped around, going to the line of fruit trees where you left the two shovels you borrowed from the neighbour.
Matt's hand slightly gripped your elbow, stopping you in your tracks.
"I know that I made a bunch of wrong decisions before I left."
"I've been trying for 6 months to reach you before giving up completely. And you? You've been living the best version of your life anyone could ever imagine."
"That's not true and you know it." Matthew said and you wanted to leave right then, forget this stupid meeting.
"I do not." you hissed, trying to calm down your rising temper.
Matt sighed, not wanting to argue over this. So he made his way to the tree line, picked one shovel from the ground and started digging where he remembered the time capsule was.
You didn't help him dig it up. You were too lost in memories, clinging to the past as you thought of younger version of Matt.
The clang of metal on metal attracted your attention back to him. He grunted as he pulled up the metal box and laid it on the grass.
You ducked low next to him, dusting off the dirt of the box. It was an old, weirdly dented thing.  Your eyes laid on the lock and you nearly sighed in annoyance just when Matt grabbed at his necklace, the key dangling from it. When you two buried the capsule, each of you got a key made for it. You had yours somewhere in the boxes that had already been shipped to your new apartment and Matt's... he didn't forget. He kept it through the years, guarding it and not losing it as you expected.
You didn't say anything, just patiently waited for him to open the box.
There was a letter inside, along with a bunch of things you thought of as long forgotten. Your bracelets of friendship, the colors faded already; a puck with which you and Matthew played your first hockey game together when you were six; so many polaroid photos with your faces on them; USB with a playlist you two always danced to.
Your eyes watered - how were you supposed to say goodbye to all of this?
Silently, you looked over all of the photos - you and Matt in the rink with small hockey sticks and skates, you and Matt sticking out your tongues colored blue with slushies, you and Matt, you and Matt, you and Matt...
Then Matthew's hand found yours, your fingers automatically intertwining with his. You started crying, first silently but then the sobs shook with your whole body.
"Come here," he murmured, hugging you. His body was so soft and warm, as if begging you to lean into his touch.
"How- how could you leave this all behind?" you mumbled between the sobs.
"It's not leaving if you don't say goodbye." Matt said, his fingers playing with yours.
"Then you are a fucking coward, Matthew."
Silence. He didn't argue with you on that, so you must have been right.
You stopped crying after a while, checking your watch while wiping your nose.
Shit. It was so late already - you had to call an uber to get you to the airport in the next hour or you'd be super late.
"I'll have to go," you said quietly, but Matt interrupted you.
"You are right," he tucked on the edge of his shirt, clearly nervous. He was nervous. "I was a coward. I thought that if I didn't say goodbye to you as I left, it'd hurt less. I was wrong and I was a fucking coward for not picking up your calls or replying to your messages because it would make it so real - that I was leaving and probably never coming back. But I want to make it all right again, I want to be a part of your life - if you will let me."
You thought about his offer and still, you couldn't answer. You weren't sure about letting him into your heart just for him to storm out again without a goodbye, leaving you behind, broken.
"Can I at least take you to the airport?" To that, you nodded, picking up the time capsule, putting all the items back in. Then you gave back the lent shovels to your neighbour and with a last glance at your house, you got into Matt's car.
...
On the way to the airport Matt played the playlist from the USB that was in the time capsule and the nostalgy hit you hard.
You remembered the lyrics, the melody; you remembered everything.
The drive was too short and you started panicking as the engine stopped.
Matthew helped you with your suitcase and went inside with you. The two of you stopped at the first gate.
"Here," he said, giving you a piece of paper. "It's my adress. Hopefully, you won't live so far away, so we could meet there if you wanted to."
You tucked it in your pocket without a word.
"Also, take this. I wrote it in ninth grade so don't think much of it. But I want you to read it, Y/N."
It was the letter from the time capsule, with your name on the blank envelope.
"I will." you promised.
The silence that followed wasn't awkward this time.
"I'll let you know my decision about what you said earlier. I just... I need some time."
Matt noded, giving you the space you so desperately needed.
"So, until we meet again - goodbye, Y/N."
"Goodbye, Matt."
...
The plane took off and you finally had the time to read the letter he gave you.
You immediately recognised his scrambled handwriting and you smiled at how messy it was before you started reading.
Dear Y/N,
I'm writing this in case I leave. Dad has been telling me for some time already that if I'll get drafted, I'll have to leave. He also said that if I'll be smart, I will never look back at my past.
I don't want you to be my past. I want you to be my present and my future.
He said I'll meet a lot of girls but I know that none of them is going to be like you.
So, I promise you, I will never say goodbye to you.
I love you,
Matt
With trembling fingers, you pulled out your phone, the tears already staining the screen.
That's why he never said goodbye. Because of this stupid letter and his stupid promise.
The phone rang once before he picked it up.
"Y/N? What is it?"
A ragged breath escaped you and you laughed and cried at the same time.
"I don't want you to be my past. I want you to be my present and my future."
"Oh, that was cheesy, wasn't it-"
"No, you dumbass. That's my answer."
220 notes · View notes
illyaana · 3 years ago
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credits to the artists who made the fanarts I used!
Dorm Life - Shoto Todoroki
Thanks to @missuga for this collab! Sorry I gave to you late TwT Do check out their collab over here!
Tags: Shoto Todoroki x Reader, Binaural, Fluff, Cursing, Minor Angst, Kissing (escandalo)
Synopsis: A compilation of drabbles of your life during the pandemic, quarantined in the UA dorms.
Word Count: 2734
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Like my writing? Do you want a drabble specifically made for you about your love life with a character of your choosing? Check out my 50 followers event over here!
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CLASSES
The Sun let its light brush against your skin, giving you a warm hug in the morning. You awoke to the pale blue skies that were painted so elegantly it made you stare. The cumulus clouds softly danced on its stage, etching a smile on your face. You looked around the room, checking for the clock to see what time it was currently.
10:00 a.m. - You were supposed to wake up at 8:00.
Worry rushed through you. The fear of you being late for class thrummed as you tried to get out of your bed.
Hint: tried.
You turned to your side and looked at the male beside you. His hands had found their way around your waist, pulling you in. His head was pressed against your shoulder. His twin-colored hair was disheveled thanks to him turning himself all through the night, His long eyelashes framed his closed lids, his lips slightly parted. Small snores came out in intervals as he snuggled into you, his vice grip around your body tightening even more.
You could help but trace his lips with your finger - it was so soft, you had to.
You pressed a kiss to his forehead, then laid your forehead against his.
“Get up, Sho - class starts in 10 minutes,” you said, rubbing his shoulder.
“I don’t want to, this is too comfortable,” he mumbled, rubbing his head on your shoulder.
“What are you, a cat?” You joked, placing your hands on his cheek, “Let me at least get my laptop on - I can tell Aizawa we’re sharing my laptop and we can just join the class here.”
“Getting the laptop means that you move - and you are not moving,” he said, tightening his grip on you.
“You know we’re going to be in trouble if we don’t join the class, right? Oh yeah, it starts in 5 minutes,” you said, slightly annoyed at him.
Shoto sighs in defeat, “Fine - but, hurry up,”
You pry his arms off of you and rush to your table to get the laptop on. Thankfully, you managed to join the class 3 minutes before it began.
“Aren’t you coming back in here?” Todoroki whined, patting the space beside him.
“Are you finally awake?” You question him.
“Kind of?”
“ ‘Kind of?’ “
“Yes, I am awake - I no longer need to sleep,” he groans.
You take your laptop and place it in the space between the two of you as you sit back on the bed. You pressed another kiss on his forehead, making him smile.
“Good morning, snowflake,” he says as he returns your kiss with one on your forehead.
“Good morning, Sho.”
“Now that you both have shown a great deal of affection, Y/N and Shoto,” Eraserhead says from your Zoom call, “Can my class finally begin?”
LUNCH BREAK
“I got the money from Aizawa for our meals! Can you all go through the menu and tell me what you want on the class group chat?” Momo shouted from the living room.
“Imagine eating great food for free?” Uraraka smiled, enjoying how our meals were paid for by the school itself, “The pandemic is amazing yet so annoying at the same time.”
You chuckle at the brown-haired girl, seeing her awe-filled expression.
“What are you getting?” You ask her.
“Hmm… maybe Udon? It’s been a long time since I ate it, and since it’s not coming from my pocket…” she eyed the menu, “I’m getting the most expensive one.”
“You know he gave a set amount for the whole class right?” You look at her mischievous expression.
“I’m pretty sure we can stay within the budget. Our class generally doesn’t spend much money on food, right?”
You looked across the room to see Kaminari and Kirishima going through the menu.
“You think those two will be reasonable with their spending? Knowing them, they’re most probably buying the whole menu plus snacks,” you say, looking at their joy-filled grins.
You saw Shoto walk beside Iida, heading towards the two males. Intrigued, you and Uraraka walked towards the group of four.
“Hey,” you say as you hug Shoto from the back, “Everything okay?”
“These two,” Iida said, anger laced in his words, “Ordered everything on the menu.”
You held back your laughter, unlike Uraraka.
“Your skills in predicting the future astound me, Y/N L/N,” she says, covering her mouth.
“Hush,” you say, smiling.
“The two of you…” Iida began, looking at the two wrongdoers, “I don’t know how your closer friends handle you two.”
You look at the scene unfolding in front of you, smiling.
Iida was full-on lecturing the two males, his hands moving in all ten directions. Kaminari and Kirishima just stood there, dumbfounded. You could see the two of them slowly spacing out from the ‘conversation’, but Iida kept going on.
“Hey,” Shoto whispered, “Wanna have a mini-date tonight? I’ll order a few things and get them sent here, and we can watch a movie together?”
“Don’t use the money Aizawa gave though - we don’t need a third victim of Iida’s lectures,” you whisper, earning a smile from the stoic male.
MINI-DATES
You opened the door to Shoto’s room, comfortably dressed in your Axolotl onesie. In your hands, you brought a hard drive filled with movies that you felt that you both would enjoy. Seeing that Shoto wasn’t in the room, you laid on his bed, waiting for the arrival of the owner of the room. Your eyes went straight to his mirror. He had slid multiple polaroid pictures of you and your friends in the corners of the mirror. Each one of the photos had a small remark, reminding you of all the memories you’ve made throughout your years in UA.
Your hands grazed on the photo he kept on the bedside table.
It was a picture of him and his mother smiling.
Your chest panged when you saw it. He had told you the story behind his scar and his life within the Todoroki household. His hatred for his father grew every day, yet he could never hate his mother - the very person who gave him the scar on his face.
“I love that picture, but not as much as I love this one,” Shoto said, pointing at a photo in the top-left corner of his mirror.
It was a picture of both of you visiting his mother with Fuyumi and Natsuo.
“I’ll admit Natsuo was not the most welcoming to the idea of me dating you, but he slowly loved you as a sibling. I did talk about you to Fuyumi a bunch of times, but she had her suspicions - that all changed when she met you, though. Mom…”
He hesitated, “...she didn’t like the idea of me dating anyone. Yet, you managed to make her like you so much, now she only asks about you whenever I call her,” he chuckled.
“My family loves you - except Endeavor, of course,” he groaned.
“He’ll come around, eventually. You, however,” you walk up to him and cup his face, “Need to talk to him properly - no filter, just say everything.”
You lie back down on the bed, patting the space beside you, “Hurry up - the snacks you bought are calling me.”
After multiple small banters, you both finally decided on Shrek and began to watch the movie.
After a while, you found yourself lying on Shoto’s chest, playing with his fingers as you focused on the movie. Shoto, however, stared at your cute expressions, taking mental notes of all the small things you did when a scene disgusted you, made you laugh or made you feel sad.
“Y/N,” he whispered in your ear once the movie ended, “Thanks for loving me.”
You turned to face the fire user, cupping his face in your hands. His fingers found their way in your hair, enjoying the feeling of your soft locks against his calloused skin. Your thumb began to move in circular motions, eager to feel his soft skin against yours. You stared into his dual-coloured eyes, enjoying the brown and icy blue flecks within each eye. He relaxed against your touch, warmth radiating from him to you.
“I love you so much, Sho - and I will no matter what happens later on.”
You shared a kiss under the glow of the pale moonlight, but all you cared about was how perfect the man you were kissing was.
TRAINING
“Hey Sho,” you say, nudging the male beside you, “You wanna train after this?”
“I can’t,” he said, looking down, “I asked Midoriya to help me with some things. The only time he’s free is after this, so…”
“Don’t worry, I’ll ask Uraraka!” you say, kissing him on the cheek, “Good luck with whatever you’re doing with Mido.”
Soon, both you and Uraraka headed to Ground Beta to train your hand-to-hand combat.
“Luckily all of us are vaccinated, or the training grounds wouldn’t be open,” you say, thinking.
“Okay, okay - you wanted to work on hand-to-hand combat, right?” You nodded.
Both you and Uraraka got into your positions, mentally preparing yourselves. You were ready to move towards her until you heard sounds coming from the entrance.
“Well, well, well - isn’t that two students from Class 3-A?” Monoma snickered.
You groaned before turning to face him.
“Hello, Monoma? Where’s Kendo?” you ask, hoping that the ginger would come and stop him.
“Kendo’s eating right now - don’t want to disturb her. I don’t mind messing with the two of you, though.”
“What’s the difference, Monoma?” Uraraka added, “We usually keep quiet, but Y/N and I would like to train, so it would be greatly appreciated if you either kept quiet or left.”
“Why would you want to train with them, though?” He said, looking at Uraraka, “They’re the weakest bitch in your whole class, aren’t they?”
“The fuck, Monoma?!” you shouted, “That’s going a bit too far, don’t you think?”
“What? I’m just stating facts; you entered the class later than everyone else, you’re quirkless since you depend on your weapons, you need to train with others so that you can win 10% of the time - don’t the facts say it all?”
“Monoma, you might want to - ”
“Stop? Why should I?” he laughed, “It’s about time someone told you the truth; you’re useless, unneeded, a waste of space, and never going to be a hero - not even a sidekick.”
“So, the student who single-handedly served you your own ass in a fight doesn’t deserve to stay, but your weak fucking self can stay?” Shoto chuckled darkly, his hand slowly freezing Monoma’s shoulder, “That’s a lot of self-confidence for someone who hasn’t fought well for 3 years straight.”
“Next time you talk shit about Y/N, don’t expect to leave without losing any limbs,” he shouted, scaring Monoma.
“Shoto,” you begin, “Let me fight my own battles.”
He stares at you and sighs. His vice grip on Monoma loosens as you walk towards him.
You run your sword against his hands, small cuts forming.
“Talk shit about me again and you won’t be standing. Get the fuck out, dumbass.”
Monoma runs out of Ground Beta, making you chuckle.
“Damn, Y/N,” Uraraka says from afar.
“That’s my lover,” Shoto says, smiling.
NIGHTMARES
You woke up to the sounds of Shoto whimpering in his sleep.
His clothes were soaked by his sweat, trails of tears strung down his face.
He was shaking - shivering.
Small screams of Natsuo, Fuyumi and Rei’s names escaped his lips along with soft sobs.
“Shoto!” You shouted, shaking him, “Wake up, it’s only a dream - they’re okay, they’re alive.”
You heard your name.
You heard his voice become louder, screaming your name in pain.
“I’m here, I’m fine,” you whisper in his ear.
“I’m right here, Shoto - I haven’t left you. I am here, hugging you. Wake up, okay?’
You heard his whimpers stop as he wrapped his arms around you. He nuzzled his face into your chest as you patted his head.
“Y/N…” you heard him mumble, “Y/N… you’re fine, right?”
“I’m fine, Sho. I’m here hugging you, aren’t I?”
He nodded, pressing his head against your chest.
“You want to talk about it?”
“No…” he trailed off.
“Okay, don’t worry,” you say, kissing him on his head.
“You want me to get you something? Milk, water…?” you ask him, slowly prying yourself off of him.
“Don’t go anywhere.”
“Ok then, koala - I’m not going anywhere,” you say, chuckling.
You hummed a song as you rubbed Shoto’s back, giving him warmth. You wiped the trail of tears and pressed kisses on his cheek.
If he needs you to be his haven, you’ll be an oasis from all the bad.
CLASS FUN
“Ok, so - everyone is here, right?” Mina said as she stood in the middle of the living room.
You looked at everyone in the living room. Everyone was excited - after all, it’s been a long time since you all did something together as a class.
“I think everyone’s here, Mina,” Shouji said, passing you your drink.
Shoto placed his head on your shoulder, groaning.
“What’s wrong with you?” you ask, worried.
“I wanted to just sleep in today…” he said, sulking.
“Come on, it’s been a long time since we did something as a class - who knows? This might be our last little thing as a class,” you retort.
He hummed in agreement, “Fine.”
“Great! Let’s bring back an old classic, shall we? The game that made all the couples in this classroom, the game that made the impossible possible,” she looked at Bakugou and Izuku, “Spin the Bottle Truth or Dare!”
“This fucking game?” Bakugo cussed.
“Relax, Kacchan~,” Kaminari said, teasing the other blonde.
“Shut up, dunce face,” Bakugo said with anger.
“Keep quiet, you two. Mina’s getting angry,” Kirishima said, eyeing the pink-haired female.
“So what if-”
“Kacchan, shush,” Izuku said, glaring at his partner.
“Thank you, my green-haired savior,” Mina said, smiling at Izuku.
“Let me re-explain how the game works; Person A will spin the bottle in the middle of the circle until it stops on Person B. Person A will play truth or dare with Person B. Clear?” Mina said, smiling.
The game soon spiraled out of control, just like everyone expected.
Kaminari danced in a maid dress, Shinsou was forced to call Aizawa and Present Mic ‘dads’ in a call on speaker, Kirishima was forced to scream “I’m hard!” out loud, and Mina sang Baby Shark to her lover - something we never thought Kirishima would enjoy.
In the last round, the bottle landed on Shoto.
The person who spun the bottle was Sero.
You knew he had something planned - you could see it in his eyes.
“Shoto Todoroki, truth or dare?” He said, smirking.
You looked at him, begging him to not choose dare.
“Truth, I guess?” he said, looking at you.
Phew.
“What do you and Y/N do when you’re alone?”
Shit.
“Take dare, take the dare, take the dare…” you mumbled under your breath, hoping he’d listen.
“Can I take the dare?” Shoto said, questioning your actions.
Phew.
“Make out with Y/N right here.”
Shit.
“Give them some privacy, Sero!” Uraraka shouted on your behalf.
“He already evaded the truth question, I’m not modifying the dare,” Sero said, huffing.
“Y/N,” Shoto said, looking at you, “Is it okay?”
You sigh in frustration, “I put us in this situation, Sho. Let’s just get it over with.”
Shoto smiled, looking at your pissed expression.
“Look at me,” he whispered in your ear, raising small goosebumps on your skin.
His hands slowly went to your cheeks, eyeing the flecks in your eyes - how they sparkled just for him and him alone. His thumb reached your lips and parted it - enjoying how you were putty in his hands. His hand slowly went from your cheek to your chin, raising it to make your forehead meet his.
“Geez, Y/N,” he said, lust filling his eyes, “You’re so perfect.”
He softly pressed his lips against yours. He sucked on your lips, enjoying the strawberry lip balm you put just before you entered the living room. Your hands gripped on his dual-colored hair, fingers entangled.
The soft kiss soon turned desperate, needy.
In, out, in, out - the synchronization of your lips.
The need for breath soon came and your lips parted from his.
“Well, that was something,” you said, laughing.
209 notes · View notes
krispytidalwavesheep · 4 years ago
Text
Hopes and Dreams II
First of all: HOW AMAZING ARE YOU PEOPLE?! You gave me so much serotonin. All the reblogs with added tags, all the comments and favs and all the new followers, you are amazing. I will add a taglist for future chapters, so if you wanna get tagged, hit me up, and you will be added to that list. Seriously, I love you guys. ***
“Will you be able to walk?” Alcina asked and you just shrugged and motioned for her to lead the way. You walked in companionable silence for a while, which gave her the chance to take a longer look at you. You were pretty tall, even though you were still rather small compared to Alcina. She was pretty sure that you were taller than Heisenberg though, and that made her feel odd. You held yourself with a confidence she wouldn’t have expected after everything that happened in the last few minutes, reminding her again that you were not unfamiliar with the supernatural. It unnerved her to no end, and she found herself wanting to solve the mystery that surrounded you. Where did you come from? Exactly what is it what you were doing here? Would you turn into a threat or into an ally? Alcina wasn’t stupid, far from it. She knew that Mother Miranda’s hold on the Lords was slipping, Heisenberg’s silent plotting was proof enough. Did Mother Miranda know that you were here? Alcina sure didn’t, and the other Lords didn’t mention a stranger roaming the village and the surrounding woods. Although Heisenberg mentioned that an unusual amount of Lycans had disappeared. 
Her eyes roamed your figure again. Your hair was kept in a neat undercut, colored in a hideous blue that still looked good on you. You were clad in a black Hoodie and equally black Cargo pants, as if the cold didn’t bother you at all. It was the middle of the winter and yet you strolled through the cold as if it was springtime. Which made her wonder if you were really just a mere human. Everything she experienced with you implied that you weren’t ordinary and that intrigued Alcina greatly.
“You could just ask me about myself, you know?” you said and smiled up at her knowingly. Alcina flustered and wiped some non-existent lint from her long dress. So, you were aware that she was watching you.
“We usually don’t see strangers in these parts, especially ones who seem to know more than they should. Which raises the question why exactly you are here?”
“Considering that we just met, my lady, it wouldn’t be wise to reveal my whole tragic backstory. And further considering that I don’t know if I’ll see the light of day ever again if I were to enter your castle, forgive me if I won’t trust you with my motives yet. All you need to know for know is, that I am a traveler and have been for my whole life. I search for artifacts, among other things, that my benefactor can sell for good money. He took me in when I was just a child and took great care in training me. He is the closest thing I have to a father figure, although most people think me insane for the trust, I have in him. And as for why I am in Romania, I don’t really know to be honest, or wasn’t when I first got here. It was a gut feeling telling me to come here, and I find that I can trust those feelings, whenever they arise.” You said and stretched.
“I won’t keep you locked in the castle if you don’t give me a reason to mistrust you. There is a reason why no one come to these parts, so I am very wary of strangers. I have daughters to protect after all.” Alcina said, musing about what you said. If you were a traveler looking for artifacts, it would explain why you look at the supernatural as if it was a normal occurrence.
“You will have to see for yourself then, but I can assure you, that I am not here to hurt you or your daughters. My last mission… Didn’t go well and I originally came here recharge a bit, if you know what I mean. Again, forgive me if I am being too careful, but I have more enemies than I have friends, and I really like living.” You said carefully and Alcina kept staring at you. You didn’t seem dangerous to her, how could you, looking like you did, but she was still wary. She felt the sudden urge to protect you from whatever enemies you were talking about, but you were strangers. That realization hurt her more than it should, but with your past lives, it was so different. She always knew who was in front of her, whenever she met you, but this time around was just so complicated.
She felt drawn to you, even with your boyish looks you were still immensely attractive to her, and the way your blood sang to her made you all the more alluring. More than ever before if she was honest. But that is the problem, you were still familiar to her, but not as much as before and it scared her. You still had the potential to destroy her, even if you didn’t know about that.
***
You could practically smell the curiosity rolling of Lady Dimitrescu. She was wary of you and yet there was something in her eyes that you couldn’t quite place, even though it made your heart soar to new heights. She was as much a mystery to you as you were to her, and you felt so drawn to her. Like a moth to the flame. You briefly wondered if it had something to do with her nature. She seemed like a careful person, but considering from what you heard in the village, you totally got that. Which is why her next question caught you quite a bit off-guard: “Do you actually have a place to stay or are you just roaming around the forest, picking fights with Lycans?”
“Are you offering, my lady?” you said, wearing a Cheshire grin and wiggling your eyebrows. The blush that colored the Lady’s cheeks was worth every punishment you could possibly get from that comment. You still valued your life though, so you said: “I don’t mean you any harm. I just enjoy some friendly banter and it has been ages since I felt comfortable enough to do so. To answer your question, no, I don’t really have a place to stay. I’m helping someone with their housework every now and then though, so as a thanks they let me sleep on their couch whenever possible.”
“What kind of housework?”
“Nothing much, some cooking and general repairs.” You shrug and the smile she gave you was positively sinful when she asked, “What else are you able to do with your hands?”
It was your turn to blush and blushing you did; you even felt the tips of your ears go warm and it didn’t help at all that Lady Dimitrescu started chuckling. Still, you weren’t one to miss an opportunity so you said “Well that’s for you to find out, my lady” with a smaller voice you would have liked. How had one woman such a power over you?
“Hmmm, maybe I will, my dear,” she said and winked, making your brain short circuit. You stumbled in your steps and her hand steadying you didn`t help one bit. Sparks shot through your arm when she touched you and you felt something niggling at the back of your mind. No one ever had such an effect on you, no matter how stunningly beautiful they were. Suddenly, shivers ran down your spine, and not the good ones, so you took a protective stand in front of Lady Dimitrescu and said “Careful. Someone is watching.”
And just as you spoke the words, a shadow descended upon you and your instinct started to kick in. Your knife was out in seconds, a voice in your head urging you to protect your Lady. So, when the shadow descended upon you, you had it pinned down, snarling furiously. You felt your fangs elongating and your sense grew ever sharper. Well, seems like the cat was out of the bag now.
“Let go of me!” the girl you had pinned to the ground snarled, but her attempts to flee were futile. 
“Give me one good reason to not kill you on the spot. How long have you been stalking us?” You snarl, feeling your blood start to boil.
“Let go of her, dear. She had no ill intentions.” Lady Dimitrescu said, and against all odds, you calmed. Huh. That had never happened before.
“Is this a new plaything, mother?” the girl asked, and you started snarling again, but a hand at the back of your neck made you freeze.
“Don’t be rude, Daniela. She is our guest, and she needs some medical attention. So be nice.” Lady Dimitrescu said and the girl, Daniela started pouting and muttering something under her breath. You were still on edge, bare containing the snarl that wanted to leave your throat. The hand around your neck tightened in warning and another shiver ran down your spine. One of the good ones.
“So, I was right about you. You are not entirely human.” Lady Dimitrescu purred, and you had the sudden urge to bolt and hide away. You noticed how much she must have hold back until now, the danger rolling of on her in waves was something you never once encountered.
“I told you that something happened to me. If you promise not to harm me, I will tell you what happened. But I can promise you that I am no danger to you or anyone else, if not properly provoked.” You said and dusted of your knees. She let go of you and turned to Daniela, conversing with her in Romanian. Daniela looked at you with sudden intrigue and a nasty smile. She practically screamed trouble, and you weren’t sure if you could handle it.
“Come now, it isn’t far anymore. Daniela will alert the castle of our arrival, to avoid any nasty surprises.” Lady Dimitrescu said and led you away. And sure enough, a few minutes later you reached the castle gate, three figures awaiting you. One you recognized as Daniela, so the other two must be her sisters. One of them looked at you with mild interest, while the other one looked at you with a spark of recognition in her eyes. Had you met before on one of your travels? You were pretty sure that wasn’t the case, but let it slide anyway, since you had bigger problems right now.
“Bela, would you please prepare the sitting room in the west wing? I will need some antiseptic and bandages, warm water would be wonderful too. When you are finished with that, prepare the guest room next to mine. We will talk later.”
The one who seemed to recognize you from somewhere left in a flurry of… bugs? What the fuck? 
“Cassandra, Daniela, please prepare a light super. I will talk to you two later two. Just bring the food into the sitting room when you are finished, yes?” The order was given gently and in another flurry of bugs, you were alone again.
“You can explain yourself when I am cleaning and dressing your wounds. Come now.” She said and led you into the castle. You were still processing the abilities of her daughter, so you followed her silently into the dimly lit entryway. *** Taglist: @imdreamingblo
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rkived · 4 years ago
Text
━ CHASING PAVEMENTS 04 │ JJK
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↳ PAIRING: dad!jk/married!jk/bff!jk x reader 
↳ GENRE/TAGS: f2l, angst, unrequited feelings, cheating, future smut
↳ WARNINGS: (for this chapter) angst as per usual what’s new, jk is sad, reader is sad, sunhi is sad, everyone’s just SAD
↳ RATING: (for this chapter) PG
↳ WORD COUNT: 4k 
↳ SYNOPSIS: Jungkook’s been feeling a little weird lately. Maybe it’s got something to do with his crumbling marriage and the way you seem to care for his daughter more than his own wife.
↳ A/N: ehem let’s pretend like i didn’t ghost this story for like half a year aha i’ve written more than this for cp but i decided to just divide it and leave the juicy stuff for the last chapter !! sorry for making u wait so long </3 anyway hope u enjoy still n i’ll see u in a couple months for the final chapter of cp!! (i’m jking…..or am i?)
01 02 03 04 05 (coming soon)
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Minji thinks you’re starting to get better. 
Well, she hopes you are because it’s been two months since you broke the news on her and anyone would think that’d it be long forgotten by now. She tries to stop as often as she can to check up on you, even though you assure her that you’re fine and that a simple text would suffice instead of having her come over every day in between. 
Which is why she’s unsure if giving you the invitation Jungkook had handed her about two weeks ago was a good idea, considering that it’s been a few days since you had last even mentioned him to her like you usually did before. In fact, today you look like you’re at peace for the very first time.
‘‘I did yoga!’’ You explain when she mentions that you look different, ‘‘I still can’t face going back to Namjoon’s class, but I remember a ton of positions he taught us!’’ 
Minji has to force herself to smile, her hand lingers inside the purse she’s carrying as her fingers fiddle with the cardstock paper waiting patiently to be handed. 
‘‘And then I stopped for some yogurt at the place down the─’’
‘‘I need to give this to you,’’ Minji stops your ramble and you’re taken aback by how urgent her voice sounds, very unlike her. ‘‘I promised I’d get this to you, so…’’ 
You’re about to ask her what she’s on about when she abruptly hands what you could make out to be a colorful piece of paper. Your eyebrows furrowed at the sight, completely confused until it suddenly hit you what it is that your friend’s talking about.
‘‘How did you─?’’ 
Minji gives you half a smile and shakes her hand so you can take the card instead of just staring at it, ‘‘Just─take it.’’
Your hand reaches out to grab it from her and your eyes quickly focus on the unicorn and sparkles themed birthday invite. It reads that it’s Sunhi’s birthday and that you are invited! You recognize the handwriting that filled the party’s information details, you always thought he had really nice penmanship. 
‘‘I think you should go,’’ Minji’s voice sounds like she’s faraway, but she’s just a few feet away from you, ‘‘for Sunhi.’’ 
You’re still staring at the invitation, memorizing every single detail. There’s so many unicorns, when did she start liking the mythical creature? She had never mentioned a liking towards them to you ever. You assume it must’ve happened during these few months of your absence.
How many moments have you missed? How many unanswered questions must Sunhi have by now? How many new toys has she had to wait to show you? How many kindergarten stories has she been saving to tell you? 
You’ve been counting. Sixty days have passed since you last saw Sunhi. It’s been seven Fridays since you last had her in your arms. 
Sixty days and seven Fridays since you kissed Jungkook. Fifty-nine days since you blocked him. 
Minji is still waiting for any sort of reaction from you. You’re stoically analyzing the piece of paper and she wonders what is it that you’re thinking or feeling. Is it good, bad or all in one? Whatever it is, her small deed is done. 
‘‘Y/N?’’ She calls out, you slowly nod and take your eyes from the invitation from the first time since she gave it to you. ‘‘Do you mind if I go? I have some stuff to─’’
A small gasp escapes your lips, ‘‘Yes Minji, of course!’’ Your friend smiles slightly and you proceed to escort her out your apartment. She actually doesn’t have anything to do, but she thinks it’s best if you get some space to take everything in. 
Minji notices how you’re still holding on to the birthday invite and she has to suppress a chuckle because she knows you’re most likely doing this absentmindedly. 
Before you’re able to thank her for coming, she stops you to say one last thing. ‘‘If you don’t want to go, then don’t,’’ she begins and your eyebrows raise at your friend’s comment. ‘‘Whatever it is that you decide on doing, I’ll support you either way,’’ Minji offers you a genuine smile and you can’t help but hug her tightly.
You’re alone again. Loneliness has come in waves as of lately. You’ve lived alone for years now, you’re used to being the only person present in your apartment ─ but that fact hasn’t felt more obvious than since you shunned Jungkook out. 
Good days eventually turn sour. The times where it seems like you can go on about your life without thinking about him and what he might be up to quickly change because your mind makes you feel bad about feeling good. 
Why did you cut him off knowing his daughter idolizes you like no other? Why did you selfishly decide to block him when you could’ve just talked it out? Why didn’t you stop him that night if you knew things would change between you two? Why did you let him kiss you knowing it was going to hurt in the end?
You know Sunhi’s fourth birthday is coming up. It’s one of those dates you can’t simply forget, it comes naturally to you. You had settled with the idea that you weren’t going to be invited this time around, it would’ve been okay since you think it’s what you deserve anyway. If Jungkook had taken you off the guest list, he was in his total right to do so. 
You want to be mad at him right now.
Why would he invite you? Why couldn’t he just leave things the way they were? You wish you were angry, but you’re not. You feel slightly comforted with the fact that he had decided to include you even with everything that went down. In fact, not inviting you would’ve been selfish knowing that Sunhi must want you there. 
And if the invitation wasn’t enough of a sign that you should go, two days ago you got an email that the gift you had preordered for Sunhi some time ago was on its way to your place. Just in time for her birthday party. 
That’s life for you. 
You’re quick to remind yourself of Minji’s last words to you. You’re not obligated to go and if you don’t want to, then you don’t have to. But you’d be lying if you said that because you really want to go, but there’s still some things that are holding you back. Your brain starts breaking down the pros and cons of going. 
The pros: You’d get to see Sunhi again, who you missed terribly and a tiny part of you was wishing that she didn’t hate you for suddenly leaving. It’s too much to ask for, but you do hope that Jungkook had come up with something instead of telling her upfront that you had left. 
The cons: You’d have to see Jungkook. Having to face the awkwardness of knowing you had blocked his number, prohibiting him from contacting you and discussing what happened like adults would do. 
Oh, and you’d see Jiwoo too and pretend like you didn’t have any romantic feelings for her husband. 
Whatever decision it is, you’d only have two days to decide.
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Jungkook smiled warmly as he looked at Sunhi twirling in her green and purple dress in front of the long length mirror in his bedroom. Ever since he got the garment in the mail, he had to hide it from her curious hands because if it were up to her she’d be wearing it day and night. 
‘‘Daddy, I look so cute!’’ Sunhi said with an excited tone, hopping in her place. The tull of her skirt followed her movements, making the glittery details sparkle brightly caused by the natural sunlight slipping through the curtain cracks. 
He chuckled, ‘‘You do, Pumpkin, but you need to settle down.’’ Jungkook placed his hands on her tiny shoulders, making his daughter’s bouncing cease. ‘‘You gotta be fully energized for the party, alright?’’ She nodded quickly, but he could still feel the excitement radiate from her. 
‘‘Gramma will do my braid, daddy.’’ Sunhi let him know once she noticed her father take a brush in his hand. The little girl much rather have her hair tangled in knots than having him attempt to do any sort of hairstyles on her. 
Jungkook pouts, but nods understanding. He’s thankful that his parents had made the trip from Busan this year. He knows his mother knew he would have a hard time setting everything up by himself this time around. His parents would normally miss Sunhi’s parties due to the distance, but he’d make it up to them by visiting the following weekend and doing a smaller gathering at their house instead. 
Things feel different. One could say that this time, everything is exactly where it should be. Sunhi’s growing older, his parents are here and not far away like usual, Jiwoo’s no longer in the picture, he’s picking back up the things that used to make him happy. There’s just a missing piece that doesn’t allow him to declare the puzzle’s finished.
And his daughter hasn’t really been helpful in allowing him to forget about it either. 
‘‘Daddy, is Auntie Y/N going to come?’’ She asked for what seemed the thousandth time that week alone. The younger girl only wanted to make sure you’re coming even though her father had reassured her that you might be making an appearance. 
Jungkook hummed, pursing his lips together, ‘‘Well, I don’t know if Auntie Y/N will manage to catch her flight in time for your party, but hopefully she’ll come,’’ he painfully lied and Sunhi nodded with a pout, she was hoping she’d get a different answer this time around, but still settles with her father’s explanation. 
Ever since you left, it had been part of her daily routine to ask about you and your whereabouts. Jungkook hated lying to his daughter, but he knew that even if he were to explain the ending of your friendship, she wouldn’t be able to understand. He had foolishly hoped that after telling her, repeatedly, that you had been out of the country because of your job, Sunhi would get the clue that you showing up at her birthday party was very unlikely. 
He can’t blame her because he’s also been hoping that you’ll show up for whatever reason. Jungkook’s aware that Minji had made no promises of you attending, but that little bit of faith he still had, clung onto you tightly. 
He’s let go of so many things recently, but he refuses to add you to that painful list. 
‘‘I miss Auntie Y/N,’’ Sunhi mumbled to herself, but Jungkook heard her clearly and his heart shattered at the longing in his daughter’s voice.
That’s why he’s relieved that she’s now running around the yard with her friends from the kindergarten she attends, screaming in glee as they all chase each other around the grass. The PinkFong playlist he had put together earlier that week has been a hit with the children, who danced and sang along to the lyrics; although some parents might’ve gotten tired of hearing the infantile music after a while. Jungkook himself is part of the people who much rather listen to something else, but it’s worth it if it means he catches Sunhi humming along to the tunes every once in a while. 
Having to entertain the parents has taken his mind off of knowing you’re not there. The party started two hours ago and you’re never late for anything, especially his daughter’s birthday celebrations. He’s settling with the idea that you’re no longer coming while he dabbles in serving food and refilling drinks, all the while having to make conversation with the parents of the invited kids. 
He can feel just how bad they feel for him, the word’s gotten around the PTA committee that he’s in the process of divorcing while taking full custody of his daughter.
‘‘Jungkook, how are you doing?’’ One of the invited moms asked him with a tactful tone, accompanied by a gentle smile that made him feel like a child for a mere moment. With a smile that could put anyone’s worries at ease, Jungkook assured her ─and the rest of the worrying mothers─ that he was doing just fine. 
It’s Sunhi’s day, it’s her party, a few more hours and you can cry all about it when she’s sleeping, had become his mantra as the party goes on.
‘‘What’s with the long face?’’ His mother suddenly asks him after he finishes placing the candles on Sunhi’s unicorn themed cake. 
Jungkook furrows his brows, ‘‘The unicorn’s face looks pretty alright to me,’’ he comments looking at the fondant shaped mythical creature at the top of the cake. 
Mrs. Jeon rolls her eyes, shaking her head slightly at his son’s obliviousness, ‘‘I’m talking about your long face. Is everything alright?’’ She asks in genuine concern, making him sigh as he scratches the back of his neck. ‘‘It’s not because of Jiwoo, right?’’ The woman cautiously asks, afraid the mention of her son’s ex partner might be too sensitive.
The news of the divorce had surprised his parents, but they weren’t completely heartbroken about it. They had known her for years, but it had never been a close relationship at that. His mother had made a couple of comments here and there before concerning his ex partner’s behavior, but were always overlooked by Jungkook.  
Jungkook’s eyebrows raise in surprise and he quickly shakes his head no, ‘‘I’m fine, mom. I’m just kinda tired.’’ 
For someone who hates lying, he’s been doing it a lot recently. 
His mother doesn’t seem so sure about his answer, but decides not to interrogate him any further since she knows her son has been dealing with too much recently and she didn’t want to add her nagging to the list. 
Eventually the party guests all sing happy birthday to Sunhi as she sits behind her cake clapping alongside them, mumbling the famous song as she waits for everyone to finish so she can blow the four candles out and make a wish. She closes her eyes with force, putting her hands together as the guests watch her silently mouth words out. 
‘‘What did you wish for, Sunhi?’’ One of the kids excitedly asks her, fingers curling around her arm as he waits for her to answer. 
Sunhi hmphs and turns her face away from him, ‘‘If I say it out loud it won’t come true!’’ 
Jungkook can only hope his daughter had asked for something he’s able to buy. The newest Barbie doll, a trip to the zoo, that pretty tutu she saw at the store. Anything that is at arm’s reach from him to give her. But Jungkook knows his daughter all too well, those things don’t really matter to her right now. 
Sunhi’s wish is something he can’t obtain ─ someone that’s no longer a call away from him. His daughter doesn’t know, but he’s wished for the same thing too. 
You to come back. 
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The small pieces of confetti on the ground, paper decorations pasted on the wall and hanging from the ceiling of the house are enough to give away that a party had happened the day before, and that someone had been too tired by the end of it to even attempt to clean up. 
Even the thought of having to deal with all of the mess that his living room currently looks like is already making Jungkook regret not accepting his mother’s willingness to help after the party had ended yesterday, assuring her that she had done enough that day and that it was only fair he took care of the cleaning. 
Sunhi’s birthday had gone smoothly for the most part.
And as Jungkook scrolls through his phone’s gallery, smiling warmly at the small clips he managed to capture of his gleeful daughter running around the yard with her friends and the multitude of pictures his mother took of her blowing the candles of the cake out, granted, majority of them blurry, he is reminded that, although the party had been a success, the aftermath hadn’t been as pretty.
The party was over when he started hearing the first goodbyes and thankful comments of the parents for inviting them over, wishing Sunhi a final happy birthday before they took their sleepy kids in their arms. He had hoped his daughter would be drained too, despite the amount of sugar she had a few hours before. 
‘‘Auntie Y/N didn’t come.’’ Sunhi had stated, a pout on her trembling lips as she looked up at her tired father. ‘‘Why didn’t she come?’’ She asked in genuine curiosity as her eyes started glossing with tears.
Jungkook sighed, ‘‘Pumpkin, I told you she’s not in town. I’m sorry she─’’ It didn’t matter what excuse he had given her, the waterworks had begun. He hadn’t seen his daughter cry like that in a long time and for a moment, he didn’t know what to do to get her to stop. 
Even if he tried to coax her with distractions, like the number of gifts she had received from the guests or telling her he’d let her have another slice of cake if she stopped crying. He knew that what his daughter wanted wasn’t toys or food. She wanted you. And as much as Jungkook wants you just as much, he’s lost on ways to make you come back. 
Sunhi cried for what seemed like hours, his parents had even tried to cheer the little girl up by promising to take her to their house the very next morning for the rest of the weekend, to which she merely nodded as she fell asleep from exhaustion on her father’s chest. 
He envied her as he remained awake for most of the night, tears streaming down his face as guilt ate him away for his daughter’s heartbreak. 
It’s his fault after all. 
Jungkook isn’t upset you didn’t show up, you didn’t have to. Not even Sunhi could make you come back. Selfishly kissing you that night had changed the course of your relationship forever and that meant that his daughter would have to pay for his wrongdoings. 
With the absence of Sunhi, he’s reminded of just how big his house feels when he’s by himself. Ever since Jiwoo moved out, the only company he’s had is that of his daughter and it’s more than enough. With her dancing around the hallways and singing songs to the top of her lungs, Jungkook doesn’t feel as lonely.
He must’ve missed the knocking at the door or the ringing doorbell ─if there even was one─ because of the earphones he had on while he swept the confetti paper scattered on the hardwood floor of his home because by the time he opens his door to get a run around the neighborhood, he notices there’s a gift placed in his front doorstep. 
Jungkook’s brows furrow with confusion, unsure of why it was there in the first place. He’s sure Sunhi had opened all of her gifts last night, lazily and not very excited about them after her big cry, but she had made sure to leave them all unwrapped.
The medium-sized box is wrapped with a white and pink polka-dot paper, a cute golden ribbon placed right in the middle of it. Jungkook picks it up, bringing it closer for better inspection. Maybe it was from one of the kids that couldn’t make it? Although, they could’ve just gave it to Sunhi when they saw her at school again.
His eyes widen and his heartbeat races up when he reads the sticker tag with the name of the person responsible for the gift. 
‘‘To: Sunhi ♡
From: Auntie Y/N’’
His eyes scan the tag over and over again, just to make sure he’s reading the name correctly. When he manages to take his attention away from it, he looks around the street in hopes that he’d find you. 
How long has this been out here? Could he have caught a glimpse of you had he been less distracted? 
Although it feels wrong to open his daughter’s gift without her consent, he feels the urgent need to peek at what’s inside. His mind even tries to reason with himself, telling him it’s probably only a doll or a clothing item, like the other gifts Sunhi had received from the birthday guests yesterday. 
With a click of his tongue, he forgoes doing the right thing and tells himself that he’ll just wrap the gift again before Sunhi comes back from his parent’s house. 
The cute wrapping paper is thrown over his shoulder carelessly as he quickly unveils a white cardboard box, tilting his head slightly at what could possibly be inside. When he takes the top off, a soft gasp escapes his lips. 
A pink and white digital camera aimed for children lies inside, there’s decorative paper placed around it and a note inside. Jungkook swallows the lump in his throat, taking it delicately in his hand as he reads the words written in the familiar handwriting that hasn’t changed from all those years back in college. 
‘‘Happy 4th birthday, Sunhi! Since you’re growing older, I wanted to gift you something different this year around. Your daddy loves taking videos and I thought you should start doing it too, maybe he’ll pick his camera back up again haha. I’m sorry I couldn’t be there to see you blow your candles out, I hope all your wishes come true! I love you and miss you so much, 
-Auntie Y/N’’
Jungkook blinks back the tears that had formed in the corners of his eyes. He places the note back inside the box and breathes in deeply, exhaling slowly as he stares at the gift. No one but you could come up with an idea like this. It hurts him, but he smiles slightly at your thoughtfulness. 
A different feeling arises inside him as he holds the gift in his hand, looking at it like this is the sign he had been sent from above. The last thread of his string of faith. He doesn’t even think twice, placing the gift gently inside and rushing to step outside to close the door. 
He’ll go on that run, just not around his neighborhood. 
As he runs past rows of houses and stores, the voice inside his head tries to tell him that he should think rationally. There’s a reason why you didn’t show up yesterday and another for you dropping the gift in front of his house without a sound. You don’t want to see him and yet he’s running straight towards you even if he knows this is hopeless. 
He manages to shut that voice off as he maintains his rapid pace, rushing past the rows of buildings he’s familiar with and the street names he’s memorized by now. It all feels so different when he’s not behind the wheel, he usually always has to depend on his GPS to help him reach places. Your address, though, is one he proudly knows by heart. 
As Jungkook stands outside your apartment building, he stares at it with the sound of his heart drumming inside his ears. Catching his breath, he’s reminded of the many times these past few months he’s been here, with Sunhi fast asleep in her car seat at the back. 
He always pictured going up, knocking at your door, and begging for forgiveness, all for you to turn him down in the end with a gut-wrenching I don’t want you in my life anymore and a door closing on his face. That’s why he always drove away, deciding that uncertainty is better than hearing you reject him.
This time, though, nervous and unsure as he usually is when he comes here, Jungkook breathes in deep and ignores the familiar knot formed inside his stomach. 
He decides that uncertainty isn’t a feeling he wishes upon you.
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